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You've both just completely missed the real underlying thing going on in that situation. To the Japanese person, the main question on their mind is is the thin
by MathYouF 5y ago
You've both just completely missed the real underlying thing going on in that situation.
To the Japanese person, the main question on their mind is is the thing the village council is telling them to do in the best interests of the community and their neighbors.
To question of if the village has the legal authority to make them do something, and implying that if they don't then the Japanese person has no more problems, misses the fact their their real struggle is deciding how to be a good neighbor and citizen. Obeying the village government isn't the virtue they're "signaling", caring about being a good neighbor or member of society is the virtue they actually have and maybe the cost of being one is really the issue, or lamenting over if it's necessary to do what was asked to be a good citizen.
- henearkr 5y agoThe "good" neighbor/citizen is the one able to explain how to improve on a flawed rule. The avoidance of conflict extends to an avoidance of even merely justifying oneself, or of any "rational" (rikei) discussion. Almost each time I start a rational discussion with somebody in Japan, except in an engineering context, I get a very negative reaction and I'm seen as a trouble-maker. I don't think it is very sane to have rules that virtually nobody dares to refine or fix.
- skhr0680 5y ago> To the Japanese person, the main question on their mind is is the thing the village council is telling them to do in the best interests of the community and their neighbors. I don't think so. I'd say 90% of the time they don't know who set the rules or why they are that way. They just follow them to avoid attracting the attention of the local busybody, there's always one. That extends to many situations in Japanese society too, it's why you rarely see people confronting, eg troublemakers and bullies in public, or until somewhat recently, at work. They'd rather ignore them and get on with their day than become a target.
- MathYouF 5y agoAny time I encountered a rule that seemed strange I would ask my closest Japanese friends (girlfriend, her parents, friends) and they always gave a reasonable answer that almost always was related to the rule upholding collectice civility, safety, or productivity. And they happily acknowledged the possible drawbacks and were willing to consider if the law was actually good. Another thing they value is to not make change until one is certain it is actually an improvement, and they assume existing rules were made with the same care. The above can be very frustrating because there's some changes that are obviously for the better and some rules not made with the best intent or carefulest consideration. But the idea that Japanese are all cowards dismisses that the demure personality comes from a collective cultural agreement that requested change must be thoroughly considered, and that it is in some way implying the previous makers of a rule were unwise or lacked consideration. So to propose a change without being what they'd consider a brute or idiot would take maybe more energy than that person is willing to give for the issue.
- skhr0680 5y agoYou're lucky to have encountered such thoughtful people. Not everyone is like that. I'm not sure what your Japanese level is, but exact examples of what I wrote are a search of "町内会ルール トラブル" etc away. Who accused Japanese of being cowards? People here are raised to avoid conflict and let things go. It's not cowardly, it's a useful way of keeping a community together. Unfortunately, it also a tool for めんどくさい人 to get their own way.