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I agree with you, though it is still a little soul crushing. Obviously making big bucks and providing for your family is more important than debating some cance
by Moodles 5y ago
I agree with you, though it is still a little soul crushing. Obviously making big bucks and providing for your family is more important than debating some cancel culture social justice warrior at work who’ll never be convinced anyway, but listening to some eye rolling inducing faff every day and feeling like if you just told the truth you’d be fired makes you feel weak after a long time. Especially if you vehemently disagree just as strongly as they think what they think.
Being honest and disagreeing would not be as heroic as refusing to “just go along with the nazis”, but just ignoring them is also a little harder than ignoring some crazy preacher on the street. It’s an awkward middle ground that just slowly erodes your soul and I find myself looking for friends as outlets to moan to when I hear something particularly ridiculous. But I absolutely hate feeling weak that I need to remain silent, or feeling like I’m in the damn French resistance or something when I actually have pretty moderate views. Worst of all? I say what I think to people who I respect enough as adults to be able to take it. But when I remain silent it’s basically because I think they’re emotionally too immature to take it.
- chitowneats 5y agoAgreed. It's important to find an outlet for expressing yourself outside of work. Be sure to keep it either local or anonymous.
- Moodles 5y agoI’m not sure if a blanket ban on politics will work either though. At the end of the day, it’s just another form of nepotism, just like boys on Wall Street all going to strip clubs together or something. It might stop some heroes from shooting themselves in the foot I guess.
- cutemonster 5y agoMoodles and chitowneats I wonder what are some examples of things you'd like to say / opinions you have, but that might make the coworkers angry?
- chitowneats 5y agoI'll copy my example from below: "There are still many of us out there who believe that hiring candidates based on their race is not healthy for society, the company, or any individual candidate. That opinion is largely being stamped out, by design, in management at the orgs I'm talking about. This has nothing to do with not wanting to step up and manage."
- deleted 5y ago[deleted]
- cutemonster 5y agoOk, interesting to hear Personally I think I like blind job applications (ie where the name, ethnicity, gender, age etc of the job applicants is held unknown for the interviewers, as long as possible), which it seems to me that you like too
- silexia 5y agoI agree, this removes racism. Having one side be racist in hiring against whites will lead to a backlash from whites against others.
- chitowneats 5y agoThat is my preferred method as well.
- Moodles 5y agoI told some stories in the other thread here. I definitely agree with chitowneats' sibling comment about hiring based on race being morally repugnant also.
- cutemonster 5y agoOk, I had a look, thanks. (Btw I replied to chitowneats sibling comment.)
- deleted 5y ago
- achenatx 5y agohow hard is it to just agree? I agree with conservatives and liberals even when they are saying ridiculous things. "Oh yeah, I totally know what you are saying" "mmm hmmm" "Interesting I hadnt thought about it like that before". It is your ego or something else that makes it hard for you to do this.
- Moodles 5y ago> how hard is it to just agree? I agree with conservatives and liberals even when they are saying ridiculous things. It sucks you feel you have to do that just to survive your job. That's a toxic culture. These woke types feel you should bring your whole self to work, express yourself freely etc. One rule for me, another for thee. Agreeing with someone's worldview everyday when you actually disagree is bad for your ego. What's good for your ego is being authentic. I get what you mean about the need to be right all the time is a sign of a weak ego though. Though I don't have that, which is why I mostly don't bother talking about politics at work. > "Oh yeah, I totally know what you are saying" > "mmm hmmm" > "Interesting I hadnt thought about it like that before". That's different to actually agreeing. I would never explicitly agree with someone just to placate them at work. How do you think I've survived San Francisco for the last three years? I usually go with agreeing when I actually agree and not bothering to talk about it if I don't think they're mature enough to handle me disagreeing, which is pretty often. But I'm never, ever, going to agree with someone's drastically different worldview just to do my job that's totally unrelated. Nobody should have to put up with that.
- MillenialMan 5y agoI don't like doing that because I don't like to lie.
- alchemst 5y agoIt seems to be a pretty unhealthy thing, psychologically. It's why 'gaslighting' is its own special term. It's what's often used in psychologically breaking people down. I think people can cultivate a "I'm keeping my cover up" mentality that helps, but I really do believe it has more costs than you're presenting, and it's not just about "ego" which is a very negatively loaded phrasing.