It is okay you didn't waste time. I know what it feels like. But I need to know more YOU. I mean where are you from? Are you boy or a girl? Do you have any ch

It is okay you didn't waste time. I know what it feels like. But I need to know more YOU. I mean where are you from? Are you boy or a girl? Do you have any chronic disease? Who else is in your family? What is your relationship with them? Do you have gf/bf? You see your life is not separate partition: work, family, friends. Everything is connected and everything affects each other. I can throw some "pop-advice" at you but it will be useless. Also one thing is sure you need to visit Therapist, good one ASAP. Consider it as investment - kind of like going to Dentist, only for your mind. Good luck mate. May the force be with you :) P.S: Please look into Stoicism too :)