I agree that the problem you've outlined here is a serious one, and I consider it a societal failure. It may be valuable to critique society from time to time,

I agree that the problem you've outlined here is a serious one, and I consider it a societal failure. It may be valuable to critique society from time to time, but when I spend too much time doing it only makes me miserable company for myself and anyone else who happens to be around. The self-help thing seeming to blame the victim is real, but I think it is possible to skirt that problem by setting aside blame and switching to something like: Something very bad is happening here, and I need to see what levers are available to me. I have much more power to change myself than to change society.