It sounds like you want Nextcloud (https://nextcloud.com/athome/ https://nextcloud.com/athome/) or cozycloud (https://cozy.io/en/features/ https://cozy.io/en/fe

It sounds like you want Nextcloud (https://nextcloud.com/athome/ https://nextcloud.com/athome/) or cozycloud (https://cozy.io/en/features/ https://cozy.io/en/features/). Both are servers you can self-host, and mobile/desktop apps to make it more integrated.