“Go use a banana leaf” the history of what people have resorted to using over the centuries is pretty interesting. There's even a satirical book named Gargantu

“Go use a banana leaf” the history of what people have resorted to using over the centuries is pretty interesting. There's even a satirical book named Gargantua & Pantagruel written in the 1500's France where characters debate the most comfortable option. IIRC, they settle on a life goose's neck: the feathers make it quite soft. In the US, a dried out corn cob was a popular choice during the early days, before the 1900's when toilet paper really hit the mainstream. Likely not for comfort though, just because it was what was available. It's probably not great for the average health of a population if they use discarded food that might be partially rotting to wipe their butts. Actually