5 ms·

I think it is for people who love their feelings and fall into them. I also have a lot of trouble relating. I couldn’t stand reading more than 2 paragraphs.

by babesh 5y ago

deanCommie 5y ago
I'm curious (genuinely), how do you feel about art, paintings, music, and poetry in general? Do you find yourself gravitating to Realism? [1] Or are you comfortable with the abstract? Because I think it's not just about feelings. It's about the comfort with abstractions. The writer is writing EXTREMELY specific narratives that are meant to evoke extremely RELATABLE general feelings. And she is incredible at it. It's a real skill. But it's okay if you don't grasp it. This stuff isn't automatic. However, I will say that you could learn to appreciate it, if you were so inclined. [1] * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Realism_(arts) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Realism_(arts) * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Classical_Realism https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Classical_Realism
- babesh 5y ago
  I like some forms of abstract art. I just don’t particularly like this form. Also, your opinion that the author is relatable is subjective. It is relatable and enjoyable to you just as it is not relatable nor enjoyable to me. To me, this author is the modern form of Jane Austen. Flourishes, flourishes, flourishes. Full of inner dialogue. You overstate the abstractions. They are obvious.
  - deanCommie 5y ago
    The feelings are abstract, not the ideas. I did say meant to invoke relatable feelings. It's not objective or guaranteed that they would in all.
    - babesh 5y ago
      The feelings are yours. The work is designed to invoke feelings. The abstraction of the feelings are in the analysis of the work rather than in the reading. I suppose some people combine the two as they read. I suppose some will put themselves in the place of the author as well. Reading this feels like being trapped into being someone’s therapist.
      - coldtea 5y ago
        >I suppose some will put themselves in the place of the author as well. Reading this feels like being trapped into being someone’s therapist. Well, that's empathy. It's not about having the same experiences yourself verbatim so being able to directly relate.
- elvischidera 5y ago
  How does one learn to appreciate such things? I think my problem is: 1. Fiction: I think it is pointless. I try to watch fictional movies. 2. Information I feel is irrelevant: Say I'm writing, I would prefer: "He proposed to her in a park with friends." To: "The sun stood firm, there was melody in the wind, his body was perfect like diamonds rubbed together. He held her gaze for an eternity, ignorant of his friends at the park. She felt puzzled -- he could see her in a way that would make even Heimdall jealous. Finally, he brought out the ring and proposed." I feel like I'm missing out on a colorful part of life. But my attempts to change this hasn't work (like forcing myself to see more fiction). I'm also motivated to change this to improve conversations (like dates or group conversations). I find more people are into this than me. Thanks.
  - IneffablePigeon 5y ago
    This depends a lot on what sorts of things you do enjoy, I think. There are many ways of enjoying and appreciating writing, fiction, art, etc. You can approach from so many angles. For example, I love science fiction and fantasy, but I love it in a different way to some of my friends. For me, the real enjoyment is about strong characters, story arcs that wouldn't be possible in another genre, and to some extent about getting to the core of how humans relate to each other and what about them is "human" when you put them in a totally different context. For some of my friends it is more about fantastical worlds that are self consistent but have different rules to our own. For others it is about prediction of the future through careful analysis of how a particular technological advance might play out. The narrative is simply a useful vehicle for that analysis. Are there _any_ pieces of fiction that you have enjoyed? Or perhaps biographies or documentaries where the subjects were compelling characters? I would try to find the edges where these things blur a little into interests you already have. But I will admit I find it hard to relate to some extent - I've always loved stories.
  - kdmccormick 5y ago
    Try consuming fiction with friends who enjoy it. Watch a show with them, see a play. Then talk to them about it. Even if you don't find the content enjoyable, you might find their enjoyment of it enjoyable. Vicarous joy is a gateway drug to real joy.
DoomHotel 5y ago
Do you hate your feelings and try to run away from them?
- babesh 5y ago
  The question is whether one feels that this work wallows in feelings.
- freetime2 5y ago
  I would say as I've gotten older, I've gotten more pragmatic with which feelings I embrace. I've learned over time to not dwell too much on feelings of failure, inadequacy, doubt, etc. I can laugh off certain situations that would have been fairly devastating to me as a younger man. I'm also less patient with others who dwell on such feelings (this is probably a bad thing, something I am working to address), and get annoyed with art that is overly sentimental. To be clear I didn't find this article to be overly sentimental, and I enjoyed reading it... but it was close. You could say this is running away from my feelings, and that's fair. But I don't think I would prefer to have it any other way.

I think it is for people who love their feelings and fall into them. I also have a lot of trouble relating. I couldn’t stand reading more than 2 paragraphs.

by babesh 5y ago

I think it is for people who love their feelings and fall into them. I also have a lot of trouble relating. I couldn’t stand reading more than 2 paragraphs.

deanCommie 5y ago

I'm curious (genuinely), how do you feel about art, paintings, music, and poetry in general? Do you find yourself gravitating to Realism? [1] Or are you comfortable with the abstract? Because I think it's not just about feelings. It's about the comfort with abstractions. The writer is writing EXTREMELY specific narratives that are meant to evoke extremely RELATABLE general feelings. And she is incredible at it. It's a real skill. But it's okay if you don't grasp it. This stuff isn't automatic. However, I will say that you could learn to appreciate it, if you were so inclined. [1] * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Realism_(arts) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Realism_(arts) * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Classical_Realism https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Classical_Realism

babesh 5y ago
I like some forms of abstract art. I just don’t particularly like this form. Also, your opinion that the author is relatable is subjective. It is relatable and enjoyable to you just as it is not relatable nor enjoyable to me. To me, this author is the modern form of Jane Austen. Flourishes, flourishes, flourishes. Full of inner dialogue. You overstate the abstractions. They are obvious.
- deanCommie 5y ago
  The feelings are abstract, not the ideas. I did say meant to invoke relatable feelings. It's not objective or guaranteed that they would in all.
  - babesh 5y ago
    The feelings are yours. The work is designed to invoke feelings. The abstraction of the feelings are in the analysis of the work rather than in the reading. I suppose some people combine the two as they read. I suppose some will put themselves in the place of the author as well. Reading this feels like being trapped into being someone’s therapist.
    - coldtea 5y ago
      >I suppose some will put themselves in the place of the author as well. Reading this feels like being trapped into being someone’s therapist. Well, that's empathy. It's not about having the same experiences yourself verbatim so being able to directly relate.
elvischidera 5y ago
How does one learn to appreciate such things? I think my problem is: 1. Fiction: I think it is pointless. I try to watch fictional movies. 2. Information I feel is irrelevant: Say I'm writing, I would prefer: "He proposed to her in a park with friends." To: "The sun stood firm, there was melody in the wind, his body was perfect like diamonds rubbed together. He held her gaze for an eternity, ignorant of his friends at the park. She felt puzzled -- he could see her in a way that would make even Heimdall jealous. Finally, he brought out the ring and proposed." I feel like I'm missing out on a colorful part of life. But my attempts to change this hasn't work (like forcing myself to see more fiction). I'm also motivated to change this to improve conversations (like dates or group conversations). I find more people are into this than me. Thanks.
- IneffablePigeon 5y ago
  This depends a lot on what sorts of things you do enjoy, I think. There are many ways of enjoying and appreciating writing, fiction, art, etc. You can approach from so many angles. For example, I love science fiction and fantasy, but I love it in a different way to some of my friends. For me, the real enjoyment is about strong characters, story arcs that wouldn't be possible in another genre, and to some extent about getting to the core of how humans relate to each other and what about them is "human" when you put them in a totally different context. For some of my friends it is more about fantastical worlds that are self consistent but have different rules to our own. For others it is about prediction of the future through careful analysis of how a particular technological advance might play out. The narrative is simply a useful vehicle for that analysis. Are there _any_ pieces of fiction that you have enjoyed? Or perhaps biographies or documentaries where the subjects were compelling characters? I would try to find the edges where these things blur a little into interests you already have. But I will admit I find it hard to relate to some extent - I've always loved stories.
- kdmccormick 5y ago
  Try consuming fiction with friends who enjoy it. Watch a show with them, see a play. Then talk to them about it. Even if you don't find the content enjoyable, you might find their enjoyment of it enjoyable. Vicarous joy is a gateway drug to real joy.

DoomHotel 5y ago

Do you hate your feelings and try to run away from them?

babesh 5y ago
The question is whether one feels that this work wallows in feelings.
freetime2 5y ago
I would say as I've gotten older, I've gotten more pragmatic with which feelings I embrace. I've learned over time to not dwell too much on feelings of failure, inadequacy, doubt, etc. I can laugh off certain situations that would have been fairly devastating to me as a younger man. I'm also less patient with others who dwell on such feelings (this is probably a bad thing, something I am working to address), and get annoyed with art that is overly sentimental. To be clear I didn't find this article to be overly sentimental, and I enjoyed reading it... but it was close. You could say this is running away from my feelings, and that's fair. But I don't think I would prefer to have it any other way.