3 ms·
Constantly being on a kid's case for not behaving/thinking like you do isn't likely to work out well unless you actually know where the disconnect is. Not ever
by kayodelycaon 6y ago
Constantly being on a kid's case for not behaving/thinking like you do isn't likely to work out well unless you actually know where the disconnect is.
Not everyone processes or thinks the same way.
- gshixman 6y agoWith respect, I'm keenly aware that they think differently, and as for the disconnect, it's because they're an adolescent with a brain that is still figuring out their body. Unfortunately, Pavlovian reinforcement is sadly sometimes necessary to get a point across, especially when its a repetitive issue.
- jasonwatkinspdx 6y agoMy parents took that approach, which resulted in me not getting an ADD diagnosis until I was in my mid 30s. While I've been fortunate in life overall, it's no exaggeration to say my life would be dramatically different for the better if I'd learned what was actually going on as a kid. If you view parenting as a pavlovian process rather than mutual communication and learning, then I'm here to warn you that if you walk down that path far enough, you will experience a day where you discover your children loathe you.
- NortySpock 6y agoWhat would you have preferred?
- jasonwatkinspdx 6y agoFor them to realize something was going on beyond "doesn't apply himself" or similar phrasing that attributed what was happening to a combination of laziness and character flaw and to then consult an actual professional. Instead I got a whole lot of punishment, much of it physical, because my parents are also evangelical extremists.
- graderjs 5y agoI feel sorry for you to hear about that. Hope you're ok :)
- jasonwatkinspdx 5y agoThanks for the kind words. I have my issues but in the big picture I'm no doubt one of the luckiest humans walking this planet and have zero illusions about it.
- bqmjjx0kac 6y agoI'm struggling to understand how Pavlovian training can develop a skill for finding lost objects.