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Well, maybe it seems like it's just trying to get you to shut up, but part of that message is that you're the one who's in control of your reaction, and that's
by ericd 5y ago
Well, maybe it seems like it's just trying to get you to shut up, but part of that message is that you're the one who's in control of your reaction, and that's what you can reliably control in that kind of situation. That even if your feelings are hurt, fundamentally you can still be OK, if you can learn to let it slide off you rather than getting all tied up about it. That's a pretty helpful, if difficult, lesson to learn.
- watwut 5y agoExcept that, kids who let slide first attempts at bullying get bullied again and again and again. And it escalates. It also creates a cycle in which a kid that was bullied once is more likely to be bullied again. The kids who are able to set boundaries, say no, respond etc are more likely to stop whole dynamic even before it starts.
- treis 5y agoOr you can teach them to fight to be treated fairly and to fight for others to be treated fairly. That's what I see out of the generation in their 20s. They don't seem to see themselves as victims. They have a keen sense of justice and are willing to speak out.
- ericd 5y agoBeing OK isn't mutually exclusive with defending yourself. But if you're really OK, you might not feel the need to engage, because it might not really matter. The point is not to let your emotions control your response. If you calmly decide that you need to push for something, then that's the response you go with.