The trouble I have is that you have to start with a certain selfishness of wanting to improve your social skills even if it makes other people's days worse. Li

The trouble I have is that you have to start with a certain selfishness of wanting to improve your social skills even if it makes other people's days worse. Like I'm not the most charismatic guy, and I know that if I try to make any sort of non-trivial conversation with someone I don't know well I will make them uncomfortable. Men will be bored or think I'm crazy, women will think I'm hitting on them, and I don't really feel comfortable using them as guinea pigs for my social development. I'm all for pushing past my personal comfort zone to better myself, but when my self-improvement comes at the expense of others I can't help but hesitate.