What I'm going to say will sound pop psychology. Maybe that's all it is. As a gay man, it's been my experience that quite a few men are totally monogamous, an

What I'm going to say will sound pop psychology. Maybe that's all it is. As a gay man, it's been my experience that quite a few men are totally monogamous, and not for any particular reason. For all the usual ones you hear, even just that the idea seems unsettling or angering to them. Many men are not. Some do not get much if any jealousy. Some can easily put up with monogamy if it means they get to keep their monogamous lover. Some cannot. The non-monogamous still seem to do well with "monogamish" in many cases. It can be an open pairing of various kinds of arrangements. Sometimes it works as a well-defined polyamory-style group relationship. Sometimes a small group of best friends and lovers, long-term and even life-long, and a fuzzier shifting periphery of old and new friends and ongoing acquaintances. And a few are simply not interested or capable of long-term romantic interest of any kind. Not much to say there. Some amount of casual sex in proportion to their sex drive.