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Why parents who think so can't just ask kids not to go to instagram? So dumb.

by m1117 6y ago

wussboy 6y ago
Your comment enrages me. Parenting is a full time battle against both the will of your children and the marketing spend of billion dollar companies. I worry myself sick and drive myself to exhaustion trying to raise sane and happy children, pouring my entire resources in to this battle and you think I should just tell my kids not to do something and problem solved? You think that counts for anything against the billion dollar marketing budget? The team of experts whose only job is to make my kids rebel against my wishes? This post contained no profanity, but that is only because of Hacker News’ general policy of civil discussion. I’m. Furious.
- throwaway3699 6y ago
  I do empathise, but only because I remember how things were for me as a kid (just as FB was rising to prominence). My parents did not let me on the site until I was 13, but pretty much everyone else was there since at least the middle of primary school. I was really introverted and socially awkward at that age, so I found it difficult to be excluded in this way. When I did finally get access to social platforms in general, my social wellbeing was an order of magnitude better, started making more friends, not being left out of events because I didn't have an account (this happened even with some family as well). Until then I would never hear about things until right before they were happening, and people asked if I was going. So while FB is an overgrown monster today, it's far more than large marketing departments gone mad. There is a real social cost to not being on these platforms. (Also, good on you for not giving in. Because regardless of how I felt at the time, I'm glad my parents did force me to wait. It's probably not healthy to plug children into gigantic ML manipulation engines.)
  - travisporter 6y ago
    For every one of you, I bet there are there ten others (myself included) who would hear about parties, see other friends make plans with each other, and realize where they stood on the social order. Maybe I am a half decade older than you (FB started when I was in college) but the day I got off of it, my close friends got closer and my FB friends lost all of their allocated memory
    - throwaway3699 6y ago
      This wasn't a case of being ignorant of the social hierarchy. It was about technology being able to pull me out of my introverted shell. Things got much better as I grew up.
      - travisporter 5y ago
        >technology being able to pull me out of my introverted shell Hey we have that in common, but maybe because we get to work with like-minded people in tech, not social media haha
- pjerem 6y ago
  Thank you. Parenting is really about saying « no » everyday to the person you love the most on this universe when he deeply want something, while knowing you would have want it either, really wanting to say « yes » because you want him to be the happiest person on the world but knowing, as a boring adult, that you must say no. And if you want to succeed, you have to explain why. And you have to do that everyday. And I have to admit that you probably have more interesting topics to discuss with your 9yo than explaining what’s wrong with social médias and its dangers, and why you won’t change your mind even if all his friends already are on Instakids. It’s not that the the topic is not interesting to discuss with your child, it’s that at 9yo, they just don’t care about it. And they shouldn’t even have to care, because a 9yo have really, really more interesting things to live than being on Instakids. Zuckerberg is forcing every parent on this planet to have this useless, meaningless and boring conversation just because he want to spy children with the hope of selling them some Coca-Cola. That’s another proof of his total absence of ethical limits.
- hnbad 6y ago
  It's infuriating when the argument is that "cancelling" this app would infringe on children's (and parents'?) rights while also the proposed alternative implicitly boils down to invading your child's privacy via surveillance software. So if your child ends up on Instagram Kids to their detriment it's because you failed as a parent but to take measures to actively prevent that you need to also fail. And this for an issue that doesn't even have to exist and we (well, Zuckerberg) can just decide not to create.
- axguscbklp 6y ago
  What do you think is a bigger problem for your children, Instagram or the fact that they have a parent who becomes absolutely furious in reaction to a pretty harmless Internet comment, using language like "I worry myself sick and drive myself to exhaustion" and "make my kids rebel against my wishes"? I used the Internet however I pleased when I was a kid and I turned out fine. Maybe you should just let your kids use the Internet however they please rather than trying to control it.
  - axguscbklp 6y ago
    Sorry, parent comment was unkind of me. I was just adding anger on top of anger. Time for editing the comment has expired, though. I am sensitive around ideas of censoring kids because I tend to be passionately against censorship in most cases and I turned out fine despite not having had relatives try to control my access to information for the most part.
    - wussboy 6y ago
      My friend, thank you. I was angry, and perhaps unjustly. We need passionate advocates for children. I was, too angrily, advocating for the parents. Let’s go together into a better future. (I’ve been drinking Prosecco)
      - axguscbklp 5y ago
        Cheers! Thanks for understanding. >Let’s go together into a better future. Agreed.
- rufus_foreman 6y ago
  >> The team of experts whose only job is to make my kids rebel against my wishes It's sad that today a team like that includes companies with a billion dollar marketing budget. When I was a kid it was just punk rockers.

Why parents who think so can't just ask kids not to go to instagram? So dumb.

by m1117 6y ago

Why parents who think so can't just ask kids not to go to instagram? So dumb.

Your comment enrages me. Parenting is a full time battle against both the will of your children and the marketing spend of billion dollar companies. I worry myself sick and drive myself to exhaustion trying to raise sane and happy children, pouring my entire resources in to this battle and you think I should just tell my kids not to do something and problem solved? You think that counts for anything against the billion dollar marketing budget? The team of experts whose only job is to make my kids rebel against my wishes? This post contained no profanity, but that is only because of Hacker News’ general policy of civil discussion. I’m. Furious.

throwaway3699 6y ago
I do empathise, but only because I remember how things were for me as a kid (just as FB was rising to prominence). My parents did not let me on the site until I was 13, but pretty much everyone else was there since at least the middle of primary school. I was really introverted and socially awkward at that age, so I found it difficult to be excluded in this way. When I did finally get access to social platforms in general, my social wellbeing was an order of magnitude better, started making more friends, not being left out of events because I didn't have an account (this happened even with some family as well). Until then I would never hear about things until right before they were happening, and people asked if I was going. So while FB is an overgrown monster today, it's far more than large marketing departments gone mad. There is a real social cost to not being on these platforms. (Also, good on you for not giving in. Because regardless of how I felt at the time, I'm glad my parents did force me to wait. It's probably not healthy to plug children into gigantic ML manipulation engines.)
- travisporter 6y ago
  For every one of you, I bet there are there ten others (myself included) who would hear about parties, see other friends make plans with each other, and realize where they stood on the social order. Maybe I am a half decade older than you (FB started when I was in college) but the day I got off of it, my close friends got closer and my FB friends lost all of their allocated memory
  - throwaway3699 6y ago
    This wasn't a case of being ignorant of the social hierarchy. It was about technology being able to pull me out of my introverted shell. Things got much better as I grew up.
    - travisporter 5y ago
      >technology being able to pull me out of my introverted shell Hey we have that in common, but maybe because we get to work with like-minded people in tech, not social media haha
pjerem 6y ago
Thank you. Parenting is really about saying « no » everyday to the person you love the most on this universe when he deeply want something, while knowing you would have want it either, really wanting to say « yes » because you want him to be the happiest person on the world but knowing, as a boring adult, that you must say no. And if you want to succeed, you have to explain why. And you have to do that everyday. And I have to admit that you probably have more interesting topics to discuss with your 9yo than explaining what’s wrong with social médias and its dangers, and why you won’t change your mind even if all his friends already are on Instakids. It’s not that the the topic is not interesting to discuss with your child, it’s that at 9yo, they just don’t care about it. And they shouldn’t even have to care, because a 9yo have really, really more interesting things to live than being on Instakids. Zuckerberg is forcing every parent on this planet to have this useless, meaningless and boring conversation just because he want to spy children with the hope of selling them some Coca-Cola. That’s another proof of his total absence of ethical limits.
hnbad 6y ago
It's infuriating when the argument is that "cancelling" this app would infringe on children's (and parents'?) rights while also the proposed alternative implicitly boils down to invading your child's privacy via surveillance software. So if your child ends up on Instagram Kids to their detriment it's because you failed as a parent but to take measures to actively prevent that you need to also fail. And this for an issue that doesn't even have to exist and we (well, Zuckerberg) can just decide not to create.
axguscbklp 6y ago
What do you think is a bigger problem for your children, Instagram or the fact that they have a parent who becomes absolutely furious in reaction to a pretty harmless Internet comment, using language like "I worry myself sick and drive myself to exhaustion" and "make my kids rebel against my wishes"? I used the Internet however I pleased when I was a kid and I turned out fine. Maybe you should just let your kids use the Internet however they please rather than trying to control it.
- axguscbklp 6y ago
  Sorry, parent comment was unkind of me. I was just adding anger on top of anger. Time for editing the comment has expired, though. I am sensitive around ideas of censoring kids because I tend to be passionately against censorship in most cases and I turned out fine despite not having had relatives try to control my access to information for the most part.
  - wussboy 6y ago
    My friend, thank you. I was angry, and perhaps unjustly. We need passionate advocates for children. I was, too angrily, advocating for the parents. Let’s go together into a better future. (I’ve been drinking Prosecco)
    - axguscbklp 5y ago
      Cheers! Thanks for understanding. >Let’s go together into a better future. Agreed.
rufus_foreman 6y ago
>> The team of experts whose only job is to make my kids rebel against my wishes It's sad that today a team like that includes companies with a billion dollar marketing budget. When I was a kid it was just punk rockers.