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Spoofing your number does seem shady. However, saying someone is a creep is not very helpful. There is a big difference between how one is perceived and what a
by xpe 6y ago
Spoofing your number does seem shady.
However, saying someone is a creep is not very helpful. There is a big difference between how one is perceived and what a person -is-.
The most helpful advice I've seen here is: get direct feedback from a candid friend.
This HN feedback offers a range of opinions, but -please- don't dwell on it. Find a way to have people you know help you ... practice interviews, talking out loud about your situation, your expectations, your goals, and so on.
- klyrs 6y agoYeah, you're absolutely right. I wish that I'd said "this behavior sounds creepy / learn to avoid creepy behavior."
- santoshalper 6y agoWell, there is an edit link right there in your post. I would describe op's behavior as "desperate" more than creepy. Desperation is really easy to spot and unappealing, my guess is that is shows through in interviews.
- whymauri 6y agoIIRC. the edit option expires after 1-2 hours on HN.
- Stratoscope 6y agoYes, it expires after 2 hours.
- irjustin 6y agoDesperate is what the primary person feels. Creeped out is what the receiving person feels. When does desperate become creepy? Everyone has a different definition. If I was an exec on the receiving end, I'd definitely be put off by all of this.
- robkop 6y agoPersonally, I can feel someone's desperation and it feels a lot different to me than when someone is being socially awkward or a creep. But as someone who's done hiring before they are all pretty big put offs (maybe socially awkward isn't bad as long as it not a interaction heavy role).
- hutzlibu 6y ago"I can feel someone's desperation and it feels a lot different to me than when someone is being socially awkward or a creep." Well, isn't it possible for a person to be desperate and still creep out others? Or even more, as desperation leads to more extreme behavior.
- dkdk8283 6y agoI’m an exec. I might be impressed, might not. Context is everything. Two sides to every story. Hiring someone is a huge liability. Depending on their state it could be a 500k bet. Give me a reason to believe in you. Red flag of this post is absence of self reflection. What has been learned during this? Why do you deserve a shot?
- CodeWriter23 6y agoWhile perhaps not literally being a creep, how do you think the various acts rate toward perception of the subject by others. While @klyrs post may have been a rush to judgment, I think it portrays an accurate picture of how someone is likely to react to such actions.
- racl101 6y agoTo be fair they didn't call OP a creep. They said he "sounds like a creep". Maybe they should've said: "seem creepy". But to me is po-tay-toe and po-tah-to. Nevertheless, it can be helpful if OP is looking for brutal honesty.
- serial_dev 6y agoI think saying like it is actually good, the post actually asks for honest feedback. Well, there it is. It's better to give honest feedback so that the OP can fix these issues and realize how his behavior makes people feel. The first step into fixing things is realizing the problem.
- goatinaboat 6y agoThere is a big difference between how one is perceived and what a person -is-. This person consistently gets rejected after the initial meeting, enough for a pattern to become obvious.
- arp242 6y agoI'll beg to differ; honest feedback was asked ("even if it's brutally candid") and the previous posted gave their honest impression. Other people have their own impressions of course which may differ, bit this is theirs and IMHO this is just valid as any other. Sometimes you need to be brutally honest to be kind. I'm not a huge fan of harsh lessons and such in general, but there is a time and place for them, and this is probably one of them.