I think the two claims are orthogonal but broadly compatible: - The speaker/bully frequently finds an internal narrative/justification and does not believe the

I think the two claims are orthogonal but broadly compatible: - The speaker/bully frequently finds an internal narrative/justification and does not believe they are bullying / inappropriate, individually or in aggregate. "I am just asking" "it's a perfectly reasonable thing to say" "they should have thicker skin" etc. - This is not necessarily incompatible with the notion of having a understood and even agreed/public standard that all communication participants can agree to and conform (though THAT is a WHOOOOLE other can of worms these days, particularly in open source, particularly on these forums; it's a complex, not easily-solvable issue, people have different perspectives and priorities, and it turns out people are trickier than computers :).