4 ms·
Bs. You choose to be stuck. Resist.
by pibechorro 6y ago
Bs. You choose to be stuck. Resist.
- giantg2 6y agoNot looking to divorce since we have a kid.
- BoysenberryPi 6y agoI wasn't going to jump into this thread and I don't want to turn this into "Relationship News" but, I feel like I need to let you know. I grew up with divorced parents who were together longer than they should've been and let me tell you, kids know. They absolutely know when their parents are together but can't stand each other and what's worse, they may assume it's their fault.
- scrollaway 6y agoSeconding. Furthermore, please don't feel like you gotta stay together "for the kid". At least ask the kid whether they care. My parents asked me. I told them I didn't care.
- giantg2 6y agoThe kid is 2, so they don't really know.
- atat7024 6y agoHopefully for them you've sorted this one way or another in the next year or so. Kids are more perceptive than anyone gives them credit for.
- random314 6y agoLooks like you are less than 10 years into the marriage. Get out ASAP. You are stuck with alimony for basically half the length of your marriage. Unless it exceeds 10 years. Then you are stuck for life.
- giantg2 6y agoI think that varies by state.
- atat7024 6y agoKnow, soon.
- elyobo 6y agoWow, those are some crazy laws. Child support is mandatory around here, and follows well defined rules, but spousal support ("alimony") is much less well defined and (in my limited understanding) less common and shorter lived. Edit: "around here" being Australia and New Zealand
- thedevelopnik 6y agoAnd to support you but from the other side: I grew up with parents who divorced when I was 18 months old when it became clear they did not love each other anymore. But they both wanted the best for me, and didn't do the petty shit I've heard about other couples where they shit-talked each other to the kid or something. They split time with me evenly. They both eventually got re-married and are very happy and I have no regrets about how my childhood went in that regard.
- random314 6y agoLook get a lower paying job in a cheaper location and move. This will lower your monthly alimony payments. You are choosing to be a victim here.
- giantrobot 6y agoAt this point you're participating in your own abuse. Your relationship is unbalanced and objectively broken. If you're unwilling to entertain any realistic solutions then you're wasting everyone's time complaining about it. You should seek out real help, either a therapist or marriage counselor. There's no actual reason for you to stay in your current broken state. Your made up reasons are equal parts bullshit and naivety.
- mr_woozy 6y agoThis comment right here %100
- deleted 6y ago[deleted]