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For example, a dying person may say: "I regret every day I spent at work; the career was absolutely not worth it; I wish I would have spent more time with my fr

For example, a dying person may say: "I regret every day I spent at work; the career was absolutely not worth it; I wish I would have spent more time with my friends and family" without being worried about potential impact on their future employment. Dying can give you the ultimate form of freedom of speech, when you are also free from the consequences. I agree that a person who cares about how they will be remembered has an incentive to lie. But is it greater than before that?

arrrg 6y ago
That seems to be highly dependent on your own psychological state and disposition … To me it seems just as plausible that you don’t really want to think of all the bad times, all the bad decisions you made. Your hypothesis requires a certain point of view that a dying person doesn’t necessarily have.
pwinnski 6y ago
In that example, the statement is both useless and also possibly still dishonest. While I might be free in that context of worrying about future employers, I might also feel heavily constrained by the presence of my family and friends. How many people would feel free enough to say the following? "If I had spent more time with my family, they would have driven me absolutely crazy. I got so much more respect and fulfillment as a person at work than I ever did with friends and family. My only real regret is that I left that one job early to spend more time with my kids when they were teens, and they didn't even want to spend any time with me, and I missed that job." Surely there are people who feel that way, but that kind of honesty in that context is not met kindly, so instead everybody says they wish they had spent time with family. Maybe it's true. Then again, most people who choose to quit their jobs and stay home end up facing money troubles, which doesn't lead to happy times with family, so inasmuch as it's true, it's empty. I mean, let's say someone suddenly and unexpectedly recovers. Are they going to then, in fact, quit their job and spend all of their time with their family and friends? Is that feasible? Is that actually what they want? Is that actually what their family and friends want? I think there is generally just as much motivation to lie as there is for any person's entire life, just about different things, or in a different way. For the same reason, too! Most people still care what others think of them, even up to the moment of death.

arrrg 6y ago

That seems to be highly dependent on your own psychological state and disposition … To me it seems just as plausible that you don’t really want to think of all the bad times, all the bad decisions you made. Your hypothesis requires a certain point of view that a dying person doesn’t necessarily have.

pwinnski 6y ago

In that example, the statement is both useless and also possibly still dishonest. While I might be free in that context of worrying about future employers, I might also feel heavily constrained by the presence of my family and friends. How many people would feel free enough to say the following? "If I had spent more time with my family, they would have driven me absolutely crazy. I got so much more respect and fulfillment as a person at work than I ever did with friends and family. My only real regret is that I left that one job early to spend more time with my kids when they were teens, and they didn't even want to spend any time with me, and I missed that job." Surely there are people who feel that way, but that kind of honesty in that context is not met kindly, so instead everybody says they wish they had spent time with family. Maybe it's true. Then again, most people who choose to quit their jobs and stay home end up facing money troubles, which doesn't lead to happy times with family, so inasmuch as it's true, it's empty. I mean, let's say someone suddenly and unexpectedly recovers. Are they going to then, in fact, quit their job and spend all of their time with their family and friends? Is that feasible? Is that actually what they want? Is that actually what their family and friends want? I think there is generally just as much motivation to lie as there is for any person's entire life, just about different things, or in a different way. For the same reason, too! Most people still care what others think of them, even up to the moment of death.