5 ms·

The most poignant last words I heard from someone about to die, and did 2 hours later: "I don't want to die." Gives one a lot to think about.

by pomian 6y ago

harperlee 6y ago
We are bombarded from fiction with the trope of someone making peace before dying. The fear my mother had just before dying from cancer, that I’ll never forget. It gives me shivers and anxiety more than a decade afterwards.
- mrburkins 6y ago
  i lost my father a year ago, and was there as he passed away. society/hospice tells us that it brings comfort to the dying to be surrounded by family - who knows (and is the least i could do to support him after all he did for me). what i do know is that watching someone die is not for the faint of heart - its brutal. thank you for sharing your story and articulating/validating how i've been feeling about things. i wish you peace on your journey.
taxicabjesus 6y ago
> "I don't want to die." Gives one a lot to think about. Doesn't seem poignant, I think this is sad. In a previous comment I said, "In America we have an odd relationship with the inevitable. Sometimes people get a terminal diagnosis, and sometimes they fight it. ..." [0] Fighting the inevitable is not a noble way to go. Sometimes people can forestall their passing for a few weeks, months or years, but the reaper comes for us all. There are a lot of hucksters who steal with the promise of giving us a little more time... [0] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=20224523 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=20224523 Children should be exposed to the wisdom of this quote, maybe from Tecumseh, maybe from some other native American: "So live your life that the fear of death can never enter your heart. Trouble no one about their religion; respect others in their view, and demand that they respect yours. Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people. Prepare a noble death song for the day when you go over the great divide. Always give a word or a sign of salute when meeting or passing a friend, even a stranger, when in a lonely place. Show respect to all people and grovel to none. "When you arise in the morning give thanks for the food and for the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies only in yourself. Abuse no one and no thing, for abuse turns the wise ones to fools and robs the spirit of its vision. "When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home.” [1] Whether or not there's a divide to go over, I think it important to not fight the inevitable. Make the most of the time you have, but don't fear the reaper [2]. [1] https://nativeheritageproject.com/2013/11/17/tecumseh-die-like-a-hero-going-home/ https://nativeheritageproject.com/2013/11/17/tecumseh-die-li... [2] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVn6b9QQZeM https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVn6b9QQZeM - "The song, written and sung by lead guitarist Donald "Buck Dharma" Roeser, deals with eternal love and the inevitability of death." https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/(Don%27t_Fear)_The_Reaper https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/(Don%27t_Fear)_The_Reaper
- Trasmatta 6y ago
  This comment seems a lot easier to write for somebody who's not on their deathbed. It's one thing to wax poetic about how somebody should approach death, and it's another thing to actually face it yourself. I think there's something important about the phrase "I don't want to die", and it's not particularly helpful to be dismissive of that. Most of us are going to be scared when facing death, and I think that's okay.
- grok22 6y ago
  Why is your perspective more correct that the perspective of the person who doesn't want to die? I think we all know that people are of various natures and think in a myriad number of ways and refuse to accept that mostly so that society remains stable. But I feel that assuming this perspective is better than the other one (about not wanting to die) in this respect (for this particular thing about wanting to live or die on one's deathbed) is just a way of rationalizing death rather than accepting that people just have different natures.
  - taxicabjesus 6y ago
    The point is that death is inevitable. You can either accept the inevitable or fight it, you get to the same place regardless. One of the recurring characters on Star Trek were the omniscient immortal Q. One of the recurring subplots was of the Q getting bored of being immortal. "For us, the disease is immortality." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqvxufh6ZDo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqvxufh6ZDo It's one thing to have purpose, or meaningful things to do. Sometimes people get to the place where they're just taking up space. My mom's 97 year old friend (stroked at 89, can't communicate) spends 7 days a week in her little room at the care home. We try to visit semi-regularly, but that turns out to be about two hours a week, or every-other-week. I've heard lately she's getting herself out of bed and falls. She is kept alive, but she doesn't really care to live. I think she was able to express this to her helper, when she was living at home...
    - renewiltord 6y ago
      It's not about stopping the inevitable. It is about delaying it. It's clear that you rage against the dying of your light constantly (as do we all, as we should) since death through inaction is available to us all daily and yet you choose action. Considering you don't take your own advice and actively consume water, it is hard to believe you.

The most poignant last words I heard from someone about to die, and did 2 hours later: "I don't want to die." Gives one a lot to think about.

by pomian 6y ago

The most poignant last words I heard from someone about to die, and did 2 hours later: "I don't want to die." Gives one a lot to think about.

harperlee 6y ago

We are bombarded from fiction with the trope of someone making peace before dying. The fear my mother had just before dying from cancer, that I’ll never forget. It gives me shivers and anxiety more than a decade afterwards.

mrburkins 6y ago
i lost my father a year ago, and was there as he passed away. society/hospice tells us that it brings comfort to the dying to be surrounded by family - who knows (and is the least i could do to support him after all he did for me). what i do know is that watching someone die is not for the faint of heart - its brutal. thank you for sharing your story and articulating/validating how i've been feeling about things. i wish you peace on your journey.

taxicabjesus 6y ago

> "I don't want to die." Gives one a lot to think about. Doesn't seem poignant, I think this is sad. In a previous comment I said, "In America we have an odd relationship with the inevitable. Sometimes people get a terminal diagnosis, and sometimes they fight it. ..." [0] Fighting the inevitable is not a noble way to go. Sometimes people can forestall their passing for a few weeks, months or years, but the reaper comes for us all. There are a lot of hucksters who steal with the promise of giving us a little more time... [0] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=20224523 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=20224523 Children should be exposed to the wisdom of this quote, maybe from Tecumseh, maybe from some other native American: "So live your life that the fear of death can never enter your heart. Trouble no one about their religion; respect others in their view, and demand that they respect yours. Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people. Prepare a noble death song for the day when you go over the great divide. Always give a word or a sign of salute when meeting or passing a friend, even a stranger, when in a lonely place. Show respect to all people and grovel to none. "When you arise in the morning give thanks for the food and for the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies only in yourself. Abuse no one and no thing, for abuse turns the wise ones to fools and robs the spirit of its vision. "When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home.” [1] Whether or not there's a divide to go over, I think it important to not fight the inevitable. Make the most of the time you have, but don't fear the reaper [2]. [1] https://nativeheritageproject.com/2013/11/17/tecumseh-die-like-a-hero-going-home/ https://nativeheritageproject.com/2013/11/17/tecumseh-die-li... [2] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVn6b9QQZeM https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVn6b9QQZeM - "The song, written and sung by lead guitarist Donald "Buck Dharma" Roeser, deals with eternal love and the inevitability of death." https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/(Don%27t_Fear)_The_Reaper https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/(Don%27t_Fear)_The_Reaper

Trasmatta 6y ago
This comment seems a lot easier to write for somebody who's not on their deathbed. It's one thing to wax poetic about how somebody should approach death, and it's another thing to actually face it yourself. I think there's something important about the phrase "I don't want to die", and it's not particularly helpful to be dismissive of that. Most of us are going to be scared when facing death, and I think that's okay.
grok22 6y ago
Why is your perspective more correct that the perspective of the person who doesn't want to die? I think we all know that people are of various natures and think in a myriad number of ways and refuse to accept that mostly so that society remains stable. But I feel that assuming this perspective is better than the other one (about not wanting to die) in this respect (for this particular thing about wanting to live or die on one's deathbed) is just a way of rationalizing death rather than accepting that people just have different natures.
- taxicabjesus 6y ago
  The point is that death is inevitable. You can either accept the inevitable or fight it, you get to the same place regardless. One of the recurring characters on Star Trek were the omniscient immortal Q. One of the recurring subplots was of the Q getting bored of being immortal. "For us, the disease is immortality." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqvxufh6ZDo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqvxufh6ZDo It's one thing to have purpose, or meaningful things to do. Sometimes people get to the place where they're just taking up space. My mom's 97 year old friend (stroked at 89, can't communicate) spends 7 days a week in her little room at the care home. We try to visit semi-regularly, but that turns out to be about two hours a week, or every-other-week. I've heard lately she's getting herself out of bed and falls. She is kept alive, but she doesn't really care to live. I think she was able to express this to her helper, when she was living at home...
  - renewiltord 6y ago
    It's not about stopping the inevitable. It is about delaying it. It's clear that you rage against the dying of your light constantly (as do we all, as we should) since death through inaction is available to us all daily and yet you choose action. Considering you don't take your own advice and actively consume water, it is hard to believe you.