4 ms·

I don't wonder any more why children don't want to eat vegetables As a counterpoint, my kids (6 and 4) find it easier to eat the "tasteless" veggies than the o

by Sukotto 15y ago

I don't wonder any more why children don't want to eat vegetables As a counterpoint, my kids (6 and 4) find it easier to eat the "tasteless" veggies than the ones with real flavour. They don't like any kind of spice on their food either. Makes it really frustrating to find meals that the whole family can enjoy... Either we all have bland food (and the adults add spice after being served) or we have to cook the kid's food separately. My mother assures me that this is just sweet, sweet revenge for my own childhood misbehaviour :)

dmm 15y ago
When they get hungry enough they will eat.
- RobMcCullough 15y ago
  This made me chuckle.
- Sukotto 15y ago
  That's the sort of thing I used to say before I had kids. :D The reality is more complex. When they get hungry they also start to lose a lot of self control: running around and screaming; fighting; raiding the fridge; etc. And these are kids that are normally very well behaved. I suppose if I ruled the house with an iron fist I could enforce the "they'll eat it when they get hungry" paradigm. But doing that results in other (far less desirable) rebellious behaviour.
  - nantes 15y ago
    At first yes, but we found that if the only option was what we wanted them to eat, then eventually they would eat it. You don't have to have an iron fist to be assertive. Besides, I kind of like having rebels for kids.
    - Meai 15y ago
      > Besides, I kind of like having rebels for kids. Well there is your problem, but let me explain why it is a problem. An iron fist of sorts is very much needed for successful parenting. This falls into my general theory of life: Clear rules result in more fun. Definition: An attribute of a perfectly clear rule is that it never changes. Why do rules result in more fun? It is because there is too much choice without rules, and humans want to test the boundaries of any game before they starting playing 'for real'. Consider this example: You jump into a parallel universe, everything could be different. You can hardly enjoy yourself unless you first defined how the world works = how to move, what to eat, what to avoid..all that. After that, you can start living your life. So when you tell your kids that they have to eat their vegetables, but after they complain for a few minutes, you change your mind and tell them that 'just this once' they can eat something else instead...the rules vanish. Suddenly anything is possible. Maybe it's possible to never eat vegetables again? Maybe she was just kidding? Maybe there are no rules? What rules are there? The kid is certainly happy at first, but now the boundaries have moved. It has to test them again! This theory also explains why games like Tetris, Mario and recently Minecraft are so incredibly popular. They are based on a very well defined set of rules. People love to experiment, and they can do so freely in a world which is safe to experiment in. They love to maximize efficiency within the bounds of the ruleset. I have recently seen it with my dog actually. He was always barking at anything that moved while he was outside in the garden. Earlier I sometimes got annoyed enough to force him inside. He was very displeased and didn't understand why he had to go inside, and why I was so upset. His barking never stopped of course, he couldn't ascertain the underlying ruleset. A few weeks ago I started to move him inside at even the tiniest whiff of a bark. No exceptions, ever. He adapted incredibly quickly, he barks much less now, and he even waits outside the door when he hears me coming because he doesn't want me to get upset. He now understands the rules, and we both like it more. If you ever tire of your kids' constant rebellious nature, it will be far too late to change it. They adapted to your parenting style, and they will care very little for your very much unexpected change of mind. In fact - if you put up a fight - they will be the model screaming teenagers we all shake our heads to on TV.
  - grannyg00se 15y ago
    Screaming and fighting isn't going to solve their hunger issue. Raiding the fridge will. Fortunately that is exactly what you should want them to do. That's the best place for them to get their food because your fridge should contain nothing but healthy choices.
  - dmm 15y ago
    > self control: running around and screaming; fighting; raiding the fridge Children pretty much by definition lack self-control. That is why they require parents, to provide external control. > these are kids that are normally very well behaved. They behave well when you give them they want? What happens when they want to stay up all night and kick strangers in public? > if I ruled the house with an iron fist Children thrive in an environment of clear and consistently enforced rules. The rules themselves are pretty arbitrary. Consistency is the key. Let them rebel against the rules and let the pre-established consequences result. > But doing that results in other (far less desirable) rebellious behaviour. Who is in control of the household: the parents or the children?
    - Sukotto 15y ago
      They behave well when you give them they want? No, they behave well in general. It's more that becoming hungry seems to suppress their natural self control and sense of social balance. (To a certain degree it's fascinating to watch) in much the same way that an overtired child loses a lot of emotional control and sense of perspective about minor annoyances.
igrekel 15y ago
My kids make a fuss about eating vegetable in their plate but they really like eating it off from the garden. Peas, carrots, chives, cherry tomatoes and beans rarely make it to the house, they are eaten directly from the garden when the children play outside.

by Sukotto 15y ago

dmm 15y ago

When they get hungry enough they will eat.

RobMcCullough 15y ago
This made me chuckle.
Sukotto 15y ago
That's the sort of thing I used to say before I had kids. :D The reality is more complex. When they get hungry they also start to lose a lot of self control: running around and screaming; fighting; raiding the fridge; etc. And these are kids that are normally very well behaved. I suppose if I ruled the house with an iron fist I could enforce the "they'll eat it when they get hungry" paradigm. But doing that results in other (far less desirable) rebellious behaviour.
- nantes 15y ago
  At first yes, but we found that if the only option was what we wanted them to eat, then eventually they would eat it. You don't have to have an iron fist to be assertive. Besides, I kind of like having rebels for kids.
  - Meai 15y ago
    > Besides, I kind of like having rebels for kids. Well there is your problem, but let me explain why it is a problem. An iron fist of sorts is very much needed for successful parenting. This falls into my general theory of life: Clear rules result in more fun. Definition: An attribute of a perfectly clear rule is that it never changes. Why do rules result in more fun? It is because there is too much choice without rules, and humans want to test the boundaries of any game before they starting playing 'for real'. Consider this example: You jump into a parallel universe, everything could be different. You can hardly enjoy yourself unless you first defined how the world works = how to move, what to eat, what to avoid..all that. After that, you can start living your life. So when you tell your kids that they have to eat their vegetables, but after they complain for a few minutes, you change your mind and tell them that 'just this once' they can eat something else instead...the rules vanish. Suddenly anything is possible. Maybe it's possible to never eat vegetables again? Maybe she was just kidding? Maybe there are no rules? What rules are there? The kid is certainly happy at first, but now the boundaries have moved. It has to test them again! This theory also explains why games like Tetris, Mario and recently Minecraft are so incredibly popular. They are based on a very well defined set of rules. People love to experiment, and they can do so freely in a world which is safe to experiment in. They love to maximize efficiency within the bounds of the ruleset. I have recently seen it with my dog actually. He was always barking at anything that moved while he was outside in the garden. Earlier I sometimes got annoyed enough to force him inside. He was very displeased and didn't understand why he had to go inside, and why I was so upset. His barking never stopped of course, he couldn't ascertain the underlying ruleset. A few weeks ago I started to move him inside at even the tiniest whiff of a bark. No exceptions, ever. He adapted incredibly quickly, he barks much less now, and he even waits outside the door when he hears me coming because he doesn't want me to get upset. He now understands the rules, and we both like it more. If you ever tire of your kids' constant rebellious nature, it will be far too late to change it. They adapted to your parenting style, and they will care very little for your very much unexpected change of mind. In fact - if you put up a fight - they will be the model screaming teenagers we all shake our heads to on TV.
- grannyg00se 15y ago
  Screaming and fighting isn't going to solve their hunger issue. Raiding the fridge will. Fortunately that is exactly what you should want them to do. That's the best place for them to get their food because your fridge should contain nothing but healthy choices.
- dmm 15y ago
  > self control: running around and screaming; fighting; raiding the fridge Children pretty much by definition lack self-control. That is why they require parents, to provide external control. > these are kids that are normally very well behaved. They behave well when you give them they want? What happens when they want to stay up all night and kick strangers in public? > if I ruled the house with an iron fist Children thrive in an environment of clear and consistently enforced rules. The rules themselves are pretty arbitrary. Consistency is the key. Let them rebel against the rules and let the pre-established consequences result. > But doing that results in other (far less desirable) rebellious behaviour. Who is in control of the household: the parents or the children?
  - Sukotto 15y ago
    They behave well when you give them they want? No, they behave well in general. It's more that becoming hungry seems to suppress their natural self control and sense of social balance. (To a certain degree it's fascinating to watch) in much the same way that an overtired child loses a lot of emotional control and sense of perspective about minor annoyances.

igrekel 15y ago

My kids make a fuss about eating vegetable in their plate but they really like eating it off from the garden. Peas, carrots, chives, cherry tomatoes and beans rarely make it to the house, they are eaten directly from the garden when the children play outside.