I live in Germany and private schools are the absolute exception. I'm not a parent yet, but from my experience as a student you just send your kid to the closes

I live in Germany and private schools are the absolute exception. I'm not a parent yet, but from my experience as a student you just send your kid to the closest school and school reputation isn't really a thing. There are some "rich kid" schools, especially bording schools, but they are really rare and graduates don't really have a lot of benefit when it comes to university applications (German universities operate by taking in many students and make the weak performers drop out or switch to a subject better fitting their skills) To promote higher achieving students we split kids into three different tiers based on their performance in their 4th school year (around age 10/11). Each tier is actually a completely separate school (location, building, curriculula, even different qualifications for teachers). Students that do exceptionally well/bad can still move between tiers every year. There is a world where the state provides education and thinking about private schools isn't an important consideration for parents. I would expect it's similar in many other EU countries. So it's not one or the other like you fear.