Why is it the only remedy that we seem capable of considering is exclusion? Pushing people and ideas away is a punishment that hurts both sides and offers littl

Why is it the only remedy that we seem capable of considering is exclusion? Pushing people and ideas away is a punishment that hurts both sides and offers little chance of redemption or learning. Is exclusion even a remedy? And if it is, aren't there almost always better ones? I grew up pretty conservative, but the liberals I knew were always very welcoming. And I have a much more balanced outlook now. How will that kind of personal growth happen if our first reaction is to exclude?