I really like your comment, may I ask why you have no intention of publishing your own works? I'm also in the process of writing a few different works (I have

I really like your comment, may I ask why you have no intention of publishing your own works? I'm also in the process of writing a few different works (I have one kids sci-fi novel draft finished, and a couple others in various state of progress). One thing that may help boost your confidence would be joining a writers group. Eg, once a quarter you submit 25k words to the group, and critique each other's works. I've learned alot doing this, in terms of variety of feedback from different styles of writer. But equally important was seeing other writers' works-in-progress, which was very eye opening, as the first few drafts are always a pale comparison to the finished product. BTW, your comment that characters take wild turns in ways you did not expect is one of the great joys in writing! I am more of a pantser than plotter myself, and even if I have a vague idea of what will happen in a scene, it's easy for the characters themselves to take control, and very exciting when that happens!