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Cancel culture scared the ever living shit out of everyone, even everyday people. Whether you like it or not, it got every male in the workplace to not even bre

Cancel culture scared the ever living shit out of everyone, even everyday people. Whether you like it or not, it got every male in the workplace to not even breathe in the direction of women you work with. The movement permeated through normal life fast. It was extremely efficient in bringing forth the necessary changes. I have no problem with using the chainsaw as needed, but we need to careful about when we use it. Can’t use it for everythig.

renewiltord 6y ago
I don't think the "fear of women" thing is real. At least it isn't real in SF where I've worked for the last eight years.
- mywittyname 6y ago
  It's a real thing among the group of guys who exhibit creepy/abusive behavior towards women. They used to be able to get away with it, now they realize they may not be able to anymore. They aren't so much afraid of women, as they are afraid of consequences for their actions.
  - fl0wenol 6y ago
    This, this, this a million times. Anyone you hear complaining about it is the very kind of person who needed to be on notice in the first place.
- brrristlecone 6y ago
  Quick anecdote under a throwaway, white male for what its worth. New hire, been working a few months at a job out of college. I was on a business trip to another state with some people not on my immediate team. There were like four or five people going in total and I didn't have a hotel room yet, so my supervisor asked me to reach out to some of the others going and see what they were doing. I picked a number from the list at random and called. A woman a good bit older than me answered the phone and I explained the situation. She told me she had gotten a four bedroom house on AirBnB close to the location we were going. Assuming that she had booked the house so we could all stay together, I asked if there was a room left for me. She immediately became very stern and told me that she would never "room alone with a younger man" and that my request was "extremely inappropriate". Sputtering apologies I told her I thought she had gotten the house for everyone from the company going on the trip and she said no, it was just for her. She nastily asked who my supervisor was and I told her the name. Confused as hell I hung up the phone and got a room at a hotel nearby. My immediate first thought was oh fuck, I'm going to be getting a call from HR about sexual harassment, it's all over, fired before I even really started. When we actually got to the client location this woman acted very creepy. She made several comments about how if she was 'ten years younger' this would be a 'memorable trip' while eyeing me up. She asked for my personal cell number. She even invited me to dinner, just the two of us. After that I stopped responding to her texts, cold shouldered her hard in person, and would only send very cordial, short emails to her in response. Some months after she left the project and I haven't talked to her since. After she left I told some other male coworkers about what happened and everyone agreed I was a hair's width away from some sort of sexual harassment case, and also agreed that had it come to that, corporate would have sided with her and I could have been fired for a simple mistake. I now walk on pins and needles around women that I work with, unless I know them well. TL;DR: Accidents happen, women can be creeps, and at least where I work young men are definitely worried about being accused of sexual harassment. I don't think this is a typical case but it does happen.
- 3np 6y ago
  Honestly, I have it, realized over the years I’ve had it since a teenager and I don’t like it. Subconsciously I keep females at a bit more distance than men. I’m less likely to have personal conversations with them. I watch myself at social situations mostly interacting with other males and less with females. At a bar I’m more likely to end up chatting to guys than girls. I think there’s some subconscious fear of rejection mixed with an assumption that they’re not interested in talking to me, etc. And please don’t assume “oh he falls in the asshole crowd” as I see sibling comments already are. This is Northern Europe though. I’m pretty convinced it exists around you as well, it’s not necessarily visible even to those subject to it.
dragonwriter 6y ago
> Cancel culture scared the ever living shit out of everyone, even everyday people. No, I don't think it did, to “everyone”. I think the degree of effect varies a lot, with the two main driving factors being (1) preexisting behavior, and (2) sources of information. > Whether you like it or not, it got every male in the workplace to not even breathe in the direction of women you work with. As an employee male, it's had about zero impact on how I relate to women, at work or in other contexts. I don't think I'm alone. > The movement permeated through normal life fast. I don't think this is any more true than when this complaint started to be made (with “political correctness” in place of “cancel culture”) in the 1980s, or when it saw another resurgence with “sexual harassment” (often with sneer quotes in writing, or just a plain sneer when spoken) in the 1990s. > It was extremely efficient in bringing forth the necessary changes. I think that very much remains to be seen, just as with the previous rounds.
UncleMeat 6y ago
> Whether you like it or not, it got every male in the workplace to not even breathe in the direction of women you work with. Jesus Christ. No it didn't.

renewiltord 6y ago

I don't think the "fear of women" thing is real. At least it isn't real in SF where I've worked for the last eight years.

mywittyname 6y ago
It's a real thing among the group of guys who exhibit creepy/abusive behavior towards women. They used to be able to get away with it, now they realize they may not be able to anymore. They aren't so much afraid of women, as they are afraid of consequences for their actions.
- fl0wenol 6y ago
  This, this, this a million times. Anyone you hear complaining about it is the very kind of person who needed to be on notice in the first place.
brrristlecone 6y ago
Quick anecdote under a throwaway, white male for what its worth. New hire, been working a few months at a job out of college. I was on a business trip to another state with some people not on my immediate team. There were like four or five people going in total and I didn't have a hotel room yet, so my supervisor asked me to reach out to some of the others going and see what they were doing. I picked a number from the list at random and called. A woman a good bit older than me answered the phone and I explained the situation. She told me she had gotten a four bedroom house on AirBnB close to the location we were going. Assuming that she had booked the house so we could all stay together, I asked if there was a room left for me. She immediately became very stern and told me that she would never "room alone with a younger man" and that my request was "extremely inappropriate". Sputtering apologies I told her I thought she had gotten the house for everyone from the company going on the trip and she said no, it was just for her. She nastily asked who my supervisor was and I told her the name. Confused as hell I hung up the phone and got a room at a hotel nearby. My immediate first thought was oh fuck, I'm going to be getting a call from HR about sexual harassment, it's all over, fired before I even really started. When we actually got to the client location this woman acted very creepy. She made several comments about how if she was 'ten years younger' this would be a 'memorable trip' while eyeing me up. She asked for my personal cell number. She even invited me to dinner, just the two of us. After that I stopped responding to her texts, cold shouldered her hard in person, and would only send very cordial, short emails to her in response. Some months after she left the project and I haven't talked to her since. After she left I told some other male coworkers about what happened and everyone agreed I was a hair's width away from some sort of sexual harassment case, and also agreed that had it come to that, corporate would have sided with her and I could have been fired for a simple mistake. I now walk on pins and needles around women that I work with, unless I know them well. TL;DR: Accidents happen, women can be creeps, and at least where I work young men are definitely worried about being accused of sexual harassment. I don't think this is a typical case but it does happen.
3np 6y ago
Honestly, I have it, realized over the years I’ve had it since a teenager and I don’t like it. Subconsciously I keep females at a bit more distance than men. I’m less likely to have personal conversations with them. I watch myself at social situations mostly interacting with other males and less with females. At a bar I’m more likely to end up chatting to guys than girls. I think there’s some subconscious fear of rejection mixed with an assumption that they’re not interested in talking to me, etc. And please don’t assume “oh he falls in the asshole crowd” as I see sibling comments already are. This is Northern Europe though. I’m pretty convinced it exists around you as well, it’s not necessarily visible even to those subject to it.

dragonwriter 6y ago

> Cancel culture scared the ever living shit out of everyone, even everyday people. No, I don't think it did, to “everyone”. I think the degree of effect varies a lot, with the two main driving factors being (1) preexisting behavior, and (2) sources of information. > Whether you like it or not, it got every male in the workplace to not even breathe in the direction of women you work with. As an employee male, it's had about zero impact on how I relate to women, at work or in other contexts. I don't think I'm alone. > The movement permeated through normal life fast. I don't think this is any more true than when this complaint started to be made (with “political correctness” in place of “cancel culture”) in the 1980s, or when it saw another resurgence with “sexual harassment” (often with sneer quotes in writing, or just a plain sneer when spoken) in the 1990s. > It was extremely efficient in bringing forth the necessary changes. I think that very much remains to be seen, just as with the previous rounds.

UncleMeat 6y ago

> Whether you like it or not, it got every male in the workplace to not even breathe in the direction of women you work with. Jesus Christ. No it didn't.