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Came here to post this, glad I didn't and forget we can't post about asexuality here. As an asexual person, not only are we not respected whatsoever here, but
by lostgame 6y ago
Came here to post this, glad I didn't and forget we can't post about asexuality here.
As an asexual person, not only are we not respected whatsoever here, but in my experienced, also personally attacked.
That your comment about erasure is getting this many down votes is unfortunately absolutely common for HN, and I'm incredibly disappointed in that.
Before people jump in who might not be asexual to try to defend this - it's such a problem I have actually shared emails with an admin who actually seem genuinely concerned about the problem. Just the truth.
I'm not sure why HN has it in for asexuals, but God damn guys, can't you ease up on us?
- azeirah 6y agoI found that HN is generally not very friendly to LGBTQ+ people. I don't think it is because there's a certain type of phobia here, but most people here are very logical and analytical people which I've seen resulting in "logical arguments for and against the existence of ..." which is just.. Why We exist because we exist, nothing else.
- lostgame 6y agoAnd to speak up about it, as obviously pictured once again here - gets us downvoted into oblivion, only confirming our feelings of being unheard... For real, it's been such an issue here I have had emails with an admin but didn't press the issue further and I think it's due time to send another one. They really did seem to care and to be concerned.
- eqvinox 6y agoYou're assuming you're getting downvoted due to the asexual aspect of your posts. I don't know whether this applies to other cases, but in this case I'm reasonably sure the reason is different: the existence and behavior of asexual people does not change how overall society works (sadly). In the very situation the BBC story refers to, it doesn't matter whether you're an asexual musician. The producer/executive/... would still expect sex from you. They don't give a shit, follow their ingrained patterns, and that's the problem. No part of "Everything is about sex. Except sex, which is about power." is in any way diminishing or erasing asexual people. If anything, it exemplifies the additional plight that being asexual brings, even over other LGBTQ+ preferences. Society expects you to be about sex & that's gonna be a very slow change.
- mercer 6y agoI'm very much in your camp, so to speak, but I downvoted some of the upthread comments because I think they are responding to something that wasn't really said. There's a massive difference between an observation and a judgment. Especially if that 'observation' is a commonly quoted statement (aphorism, as has been pointed out). Personally, I'm pretty close to asexual if we'd consider sexuality a spectrum. As such, if anything, I find the observation valuable because it underlines how much sex plays a role in areas of life where really perhaps it shouldn't. Pointing out something that is true or at worst perceived to be true is in no way equal to agreeing with it, or morally defending it.
- lostgame 6y agoI...might agree with downvoting maybe the poster's original point, but, as an asexual person, blanket statements like the world revolves around sex absolutely do seem to completely ignore the ever-growing movement of openly asexual individuals. My responses, however, about the general negative atmosphere towards LGTBQ+ folks here, especially asexuals in particular - (no idea why, asexuals in particular; it's just relentless, sometimes) - also got downvoted into near oblivion. They consistently have, and I regret even opening up about it, honestly, because I hate getting dragged into this shit online, but I wanted to actually back up and validate the OP who has evidently had an extremely similar experience to my own, that; yes, HN has a long-standing problem with LGBTQ+ relations, and neither OP or I are the first to experience or post about it. That we choose to open up about the negative treatment, and get downvoted for it, for me; is an issue of respect and being heard. Downvotes on a post saying that we feel the community needs work with regards to respect for LGBTQ+ people obviously only make, at least myself - feel even shittier and more unheard. Getting downvoted into oblivion for opening up about the negative treatment of LGBTQ+ individuals on this particular forum seems clearly intentionally * phobic and that's just a shit sandwich I can't do much about. Is it the stigma associated with asexuality? Is is just general * phobia? I'm not sure what makes HN in particular so awful with regards to LGBTQ+ issues - today has certainly all but reaffirmed that for me - but for such an intelligent crowd, and a bunch of people from the Bay area and shit; I'm honestly continually baffled and unfortunately it appears to be a growing issue that is getting worse, rather than improving in any way.
- A12-B 6y agoIt's ok. If you even slightly hint at being self righteous or virtuous you will get downvoted. I saw it coming the second I said 'asexual people exist', which is just a declarative statement of fact and nothing more.
- Clewza313 6y agoThey got downvotes because it's not relevant to the point of the saying. Which this little flap just underlined, because asexuality is defined as a lack of interest in sex, once again demonstrating that everything is indeed about sex (or lack thereof).
- A12-B 6y agoNot really. That's like saying everything is about food because even when it's not about food, it's still about food in relation to something else. You still have to prove everything is about sex, or we can do this with any object and assert it as true.
- lostgame 6y agoThis is hilarious. 'Everything is about food.' 'Well, an iPhone isn't food.' 'Well, you had to mention that an iPhone wasn't food, therefore everything is indeed about food, or lack thereof!' ... There's a term for this type of fallacious reasoning, I forget what it is - anyone?
- randomchars 6y ago> 'Everything is about food.' > 'Well, an iPhone isn't food.' That's just absurd, of course an iPhone is not food... However, - You can use your iPhone to take pictures of your food - You can look up how to cook food - You can order food - You can use it in jobs, that help you earn money to buy food - The people in china who assemble them do it, so they can buy food - etc... Everything is about food, just like sex, because those two are among the most important things for survival of an individual and the species.
- caseysoftware 6y ago> I'm not sure why HN has it in for asexuals, but God damn guys, can't you ease up on us? Complaining about the erasure of asexual people as you use "guys" to erase non-men is an unfortunate combo.
- lostgame 6y agoMy apologies. I use 'guys' gender-neutrally, I should have said 'y'all', which was the intention. Thanks for pointing that out. I appreciate it.