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> I have told myself my marriage is different Being in love does feel earth-shatteringly special, unimaginably unique, irreplaceable; but the author is right t

> I have told myself my marriage is different Being in love does feel earth-shatteringly special, unimaginably unique, irreplaceable; but the author is right that that’s how everyone in love feels. I don’t think that cheapens love, or means that my love for my spouse is “less” because others feel symmetrically the same, or even because I could have felt it with someone else, too. I think that is what it is to be in love: an overwhelming all-consuming feeling of everything being one-of-a-kind and precious and Right. Thank God it’s not impossibly rare, or only possible under the most specific circumstances! (This is not to say that love is easy or feels like that all the time—it takes a lot of work, but that work feels worth it and important because of how it feels during the moments when it does come effortlessly.)

mxcrossb 6y ago
> It has to feel like the two of you cracked something open and are scamming the system, and yes, you’re technically getting married, but clearly this is something grander and deeper than the law ever scratched. This was the part that really resonated for me enough to share the article. We live in societies that simultaneously make love and marriage the end point of every movie, while also all being insanely cynical of the whole institution. So I think there is some kind of rationalization going on in our heads trying to handle the fact that we don’t believe in marriage, yet we’re getting married!
curation 6y ago
Perhaps love is actually the thing that makes us different from animals. We will ruin our lives for it. It is not that it is 'not special' but rather the antagonism (being stuck on someone and never being able to really full reach them across the abyss of the real)that creates our subjectivity.In love we recognizes ourselves AS universal (vs as an example of universality)through the act of falling, risking, trying to mean something. These are the ideas of the Slovenian Philosophical group including Dolar and Zizek right now. (Sex and the Failed Absolute is a good start)

mxcrossb 6y ago

> It has to feel like the two of you cracked something open and are scamming the system, and yes, you’re technically getting married, but clearly this is something grander and deeper than the law ever scratched. This was the part that really resonated for me enough to share the article. We live in societies that simultaneously make love and marriage the end point of every movie, while also all being insanely cynical of the whole institution. So I think there is some kind of rationalization going on in our heads trying to handle the fact that we don’t believe in marriage, yet we’re getting married!

curation 6y ago

Perhaps love is actually the thing that makes us different from animals. We will ruin our lives for it. It is not that it is 'not special' but rather the antagonism (being stuck on someone and never being able to really full reach them across the abyss of the real)that creates our subjectivity.In love we recognizes ourselves AS universal (vs as an example of universality)through the act of falling, risking, trying to mean something. These are the ideas of the Slovenian Philosophical group including Dolar and Zizek right now. (Sex and the Failed Absolute is a good start)