4 ms·

>I’m not really sure why I am this way, but I do know that the periods in my life when I have tried to not be this way have been some of the most miserable Aft

>I’m not really sure why I am this way, but I do know that the periods in my life when I have tried to not be this way have been some of the most miserable After getting diagnosed with ADHD last year at 32 a lot of things in my life made sense, including why I tend to focus on whatever I'm interested to the exclusion of almost all other things and just get into things way, way too intensely. There is no getting a little bit interested in something and just engaging with things casually for me. If I get into something it gets extreme. That can last 3 days, 3 weeks, 3 months, or 3 years. I tend to like it when it's 3 years as the short duration hyperfocus tends to lead to a lot of impulse buys related to the obsession that then become useless once I'm no longer interested. The times when it goes for years I wind up outstripping my peers as most noone can match the time and intensity I put in.

fantod 6y ago
What does this have to do with ADHD? I've always been this way as well. Do I have ADHD? I would have assumed the opposite.
- gowld 6y ago
  ADHD is an "executive function" disorder -- it's hard for your brain to consistently focus on doing what you "want" it to do. It's stereotypically thought of as an inability to focus your attention ("can't sit still and concentrate"), but it's also an inability to stop focusing on something you know isn't in your overall interest/plans.
- nullsense 6y ago
  >What does this have to do with ADHD? A lot. So called "hyperfocus" is a hallmark of ADHD. Most people might think of ADHD as can't concentrate or get distracted easily due to the "attention deficit" moniker but in reality ADHD is badly named, and it's much more an inability to direct your attention. Hyperfocus is the the opposite extreme of not being able to concentrate and getting distracted easily as you find yourself unable to switch your attention away from what it is you're interested in. This is especially problematic when you have other activities that require your attention like filing your taxes, folding the washing, taking out the trash and doing the dishes as you tend to not be able to get your brain to accept engaging in those tasks and often some of them wind up left undone. Sure you made progress in whatever the latest obsession was, but you find relationships with those around you strained with this constant back and forth of "you left dirty dishes in the sink again last night, you forgot to take out the rubbish again, and when you fold the washing don't just fold the washing but also put it away please" and all you want to talk about is the cool new stuff you learned last night. Edit: I find it quaint that people can consider how hard they should push themselves and have the option of doing it or not. I get sucked into it no matter what.
  - meowkit 6y ago
    Well I thought I didn’t have ADHD because I hyperfocus on things. Will have to speak to a general practitioner I guess...
    - nullsense 6y ago
      GPs are kinda useless, that being said I first brought it up with my GP who referred me to someone in my area who specialises in it. I've got another comment in this thread with several links. In general if you resonate with a lot of that stuff it's worth getting an evaluation.
    - nonbirithm 6y ago
      This line of reasoning was precisely why I ended up missing a diagnosis of ADD by 17 years. It was because the specialist said that since I could pay attention to the things I "liked," a diagnosis was not appropriate for me. My life could have turned out a lot differently if I was medicated sooner. I believe that people should no longer treat AD(H)D as an acronym. It isn't accurate to call it a chronic "deficit of attention" and hyperactivity isn't necessarily a symptom. It's unfortunate that the name has to stay for the purpose of recognition in the face of the new evidence we've gathered in the past few decades.
      - ZephyrBlu 6y ago
        > It was because the specialist said that since I could pay attention to the things I "liked," a diagnosis was not appropriate for me Interesting. I feel like that fits me to a T. If I'm not interested in something, it's very hard for me to get in to a focused state of mind. Why did they disqualify you based on being able to focus on things you like?
        nullsense 6y ago
        >Why did they disqualify you based on being able to focus on things you like? Lack of knowledge on the part of the person assessing them. Some people who go for diagnosis wind up going to people who don't specialise in it and they wind up being told these kind of things.
- deleted 6y ago
  [deleted]
M277 6y ago
Yeah, this really resonates with me. I am starting to feel it's a burden, though, because I really feel that I have no life. I can't do multiple things... either focus on studying and studying alone (and get above average grades).. but basically end up like I am now -- friendless, with boring hobbies and interests and very lonely. Or focus on things that fill my life, and catastrophically mess up my education. And for the discipline I want to work in, I really need good grades (but also good social skills). I also want to add that despite studying nearly 24/7, and fully understanding every single concept (and much more!), I still manage to mess up in exams due to the lack of concentration (I.e. accidentally saw that plus as a minus, didn't see that term, etc. Dumb things like that). (I need time to hyperfocus, and the exam durations don't permit this) I am still young, so this really worries me. I feel that I have basically wasted my teenage-hood, childhood, and now on the path of wasting my youth as well.
- nullsense 6y ago
  >I can't do multiple things. I feel ya man. The more interesting thing always wins and the other thing gets forgotten about or "I'll come back to it". Trying to do more than one thing feels conflicting pretty quickly. When I was younger in my mid 20s before I was diagnosed there was a period where it was amazing. People around me couldn't understand how I was able to get on the level I was able to get on. But if you zoom out and look at my life on the whole from 17 to 27 I had 5 different jobs and _in aggregate_ only managed to be gainfully employed for 1 year out of those 10. My early adult life was a wreck. Now I'm in my early 30s Ive got a decent career because I hyperfocused on that and instead now my health is a wreck. After suffering a brush with burnout last year I'm now trying to focus on my health. I think I cycle back and forth on it being a burden. Pre-diagnosis I just had no idea why I felt consumed by what I was into to the point where some days I felt like I had no agency because I was starting to get that burny-outy feeling and wish I could do something else with my time but was always find myself sucked into "just. one. more". Though there are times when you just are constantly in this deep flow state and nothing else matters. It's just impossible to balance. There is no balance.
  - M277 6y ago
    Does the diagnosis (and the medication) at least help with balancing things a bit? I still haven't actually got diagnosed. It's only recently that I started suspecting I may have some form of ADHD.

fantod 6y ago

What does this have to do with ADHD? I've always been this way as well. Do I have ADHD? I would have assumed the opposite.

gowld 6y ago
ADHD is an "executive function" disorder -- it's hard for your brain to consistently focus on doing what you "want" it to do. It's stereotypically thought of as an inability to focus your attention ("can't sit still and concentrate"), but it's also an inability to stop focusing on something you know isn't in your overall interest/plans.
nullsense 6y ago
>What does this have to do with ADHD? A lot. So called "hyperfocus" is a hallmark of ADHD. Most people might think of ADHD as can't concentrate or get distracted easily due to the "attention deficit" moniker but in reality ADHD is badly named, and it's much more an inability to direct your attention. Hyperfocus is the the opposite extreme of not being able to concentrate and getting distracted easily as you find yourself unable to switch your attention away from what it is you're interested in. This is especially problematic when you have other activities that require your attention like filing your taxes, folding the washing, taking out the trash and doing the dishes as you tend to not be able to get your brain to accept engaging in those tasks and often some of them wind up left undone. Sure you made progress in whatever the latest obsession was, but you find relationships with those around you strained with this constant back and forth of "you left dirty dishes in the sink again last night, you forgot to take out the rubbish again, and when you fold the washing don't just fold the washing but also put it away please" and all you want to talk about is the cool new stuff you learned last night. Edit: I find it quaint that people can consider how hard they should push themselves and have the option of doing it or not. I get sucked into it no matter what.
- meowkit 6y ago
  Well I thought I didn’t have ADHD because I hyperfocus on things. Will have to speak to a general practitioner I guess...
  - nullsense 6y ago
    GPs are kinda useless, that being said I first brought it up with my GP who referred me to someone in my area who specialises in it. I've got another comment in this thread with several links. In general if you resonate with a lot of that stuff it's worth getting an evaluation.
  - nonbirithm 6y ago
    This line of reasoning was precisely why I ended up missing a diagnosis of ADD by 17 years. It was because the specialist said that since I could pay attention to the things I "liked," a diagnosis was not appropriate for me. My life could have turned out a lot differently if I was medicated sooner. I believe that people should no longer treat AD(H)D as an acronym. It isn't accurate to call it a chronic "deficit of attention" and hyperactivity isn't necessarily a symptom. It's unfortunate that the name has to stay for the purpose of recognition in the face of the new evidence we've gathered in the past few decades.
    - ZephyrBlu 6y ago
      > It was because the specialist said that since I could pay attention to the things I "liked," a diagnosis was not appropriate for me Interesting. I feel like that fits me to a T. If I'm not interested in something, it's very hard for me to get in to a focused state of mind. Why did they disqualify you based on being able to focus on things you like?
      - nullsense 6y ago
        >Why did they disqualify you based on being able to focus on things you like? Lack of knowledge on the part of the person assessing them. Some people who go for diagnosis wind up going to people who don't specialise in it and they wind up being told these kind of things.
deleted 6y ago
[deleted]

M277 6y ago

Yeah, this really resonates with me. I am starting to feel it's a burden, though, because I really feel that I have no life. I can't do multiple things... either focus on studying and studying alone (and get above average grades).. but basically end up like I am now -- friendless, with boring hobbies and interests and very lonely. Or focus on things that fill my life, and catastrophically mess up my education. And for the discipline I want to work in, I really need good grades (but also good social skills). I also want to add that despite studying nearly 24/7, and fully understanding every single concept (and much more!), I still manage to mess up in exams due to the lack of concentration (I.e. accidentally saw that plus as a minus, didn't see that term, etc. Dumb things like that). (I need time to hyperfocus, and the exam durations don't permit this) I am still young, so this really worries me. I feel that I have basically wasted my teenage-hood, childhood, and now on the path of wasting my youth as well.

nullsense 6y ago
>I can't do multiple things. I feel ya man. The more interesting thing always wins and the other thing gets forgotten about or "I'll come back to it". Trying to do more than one thing feels conflicting pretty quickly. When I was younger in my mid 20s before I was diagnosed there was a period where it was amazing. People around me couldn't understand how I was able to get on the level I was able to get on. But if you zoom out and look at my life on the whole from 17 to 27 I had 5 different jobs and _in aggregate_ only managed to be gainfully employed for 1 year out of those 10. My early adult life was a wreck. Now I'm in my early 30s Ive got a decent career because I hyperfocused on that and instead now my health is a wreck. After suffering a brush with burnout last year I'm now trying to focus on my health. I think I cycle back and forth on it being a burden. Pre-diagnosis I just had no idea why I felt consumed by what I was into to the point where some days I felt like I had no agency because I was starting to get that burny-outy feeling and wish I could do something else with my time but was always find myself sucked into "just. one. more". Though there are times when you just are constantly in this deep flow state and nothing else matters. It's just impossible to balance. There is no balance.
- M277 6y ago
  Does the diagnosis (and the medication) at least help with balancing things a bit? I still haven't actually got diagnosed. It's only recently that I started suspecting I may have some form of ADHD.