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English as She Is Spoke
- gumby 6y agoThis famous book is the inspiration of the “my hovercraft is full of eels” skit by monty Python.
- jerzmacow 6y agoSupposedly a lot of the crazy Cardiacs lyrics were inspired by this book
- jet_32951 6y agoThat answers a hell of a lot of my questions. I wondered why she was hiding behind the shed.
- eslaught 6y ago> to craunch a marmoset I have to say, there really is something magical about this.
- haecceity 6y ago> Mark Twain said of English as She Is Spoke that "Nobody can add to the absurdity of this book, nobody can imitate it successfully, nobody can hope to produce its fellow; it is perfect."[6] Maybe a weekend playing with gpt-3 will prove otherwise. Edit: nevermind it's not even grammatical
- nkozyra 6y ago> nevermind it's not even grammatical Neither is proper English ;)
- colanderman 6y ago> it's not even grammatical That's what GPT-2 is for! "To craunch a marmoset, it may take less than two hours. But a brindle should be done within five." "You mistake you! It is a frog. It is one of the most powerful of the edible frogs,' Jadon said as he dragged its body slowly toward the throne." "That pond it seems me many multiplied of fishes. Let us amuse rather to the fishing. This fish filled with colors, motion. O green and smooth, It move a high spiral."
- andai 6y agoDid you pre-train it on anything?
- colanderman 6y agoNope. This is the provided 774M model with top-P sampling at 95%, prompted with the text in italics.
- cbfrench 6y ago“You mistake you! It is a frog.” remains one of my all-time favorite phrases.
- icefrakker 6y agoThis reminds me of the youtube video where the korean english teacher is teaching kids to pronounce coke as cock.
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- mumblemumble 6y agoSounds like the OG Google Translate.
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- codazoda 6y agoNow I wonder, was the poorly translated game translated that way on purpose? From memory: > Someone set us up the bomb! > Make your time, ha ha ha.
- nerdponx 6y agoFor anyone who hasn't seen it: https://youtu.be/jQE66WA2s-A https://youtu.be/jQE66WA2s-A
- stickfigure 6y ago...you are one of today's lucky 10,000!
- howlgarnish 6y agoThat would be Zero Wing of "All your base are belong to us" fame, and no, that was just a bad translation. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/All_your_base_are_belong_to_us https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/All_your_base_are_belong_to_us Random anecdote: in 2005, when "all your base" was still in peak meme, I happened to be in Kuta Square in Bali with a friend when Jemaah Islamiyah blew up one of their devices. Rattled but unharmed and unclear on what exactly had just happened, we returned to our hotel and watched TV news. Once the penny dropped, the following dialogue ensued: - What happen? - Someone set us up the bomb.
- joshspankit 6y agoWas that dialog on the TV news??
- howlgarnish 6y agoNo, it was us realizing that somebody actually set us up the bomb, instead of it being an LPG canister explosion in a restaurant etc.
- coldpie 6y agoThere's a great discussion of what a proper translation of Zero Wing might have been like here: https://legendsoflocalization.com/lets-take-a-peek-at-zero-wings-all-your-base-translation/ https://legendsoflocalization.com/lets-take-a-peek-at-zero-w...
- waiseristy 6y agoGoogle translate still spits out some pretty funny translations Portuguese: Este lago parece-me bem piscoso. Vamos pescar para nos divertirmos. Google: This lake looks very fishy to me. Let's go fishing for fun. Actual : This lake looks full of fish. Let's have some fun fishing.
- mtippett 6y ago"Missed it by that much". Posted almost exactly the same within 30 seconds of you... Actually thought that I had some how double posted.
- waiseristy 6y agoLol you even formatted it similarly
- ma2rten 6y agoDeepL (which is sometimes better than Google) returns almost the same translation: This lake looks pretty fishy to me. Let's go fishing for fun. Maybe the language that the book uses is dated making those machine translation systems trip up?
- frozenlettuce 6y ago"piscoso" is a very specific term (if I google that I get just dictionary entries, almost no actual use). Replacing it with "cheio de peixe" (full of fish) would make the translation much easier
- mtippett 6y agoGoogle translate is just as humorous and reasonably similar. eg: Este lago parece-me bem piscoso. Vamos pescar para nos divertirmos. Google -> This lake looks very fishy to me. Let's go fishing for fun. English as She is Spoke -> That pond it seems me many multiplied of fishes. Let us amuse rather to the fishing. English version -> This lake looks full of fish. Let's have some fun fishing.
- joshspankit 6y ago“Let us amuse, rather, to the fishing!” I could almost see this in a period drama.
- jet_32951 6y agoMaking paps for the cats over here.
- russellbeattie 6y agoAn interesting cultural phenomenon is taking place because of automated translation services like Google Translate. I learned of it in another thread on HN a few months ago. People are realizing that what they write will be translated by machine and are adjusting their written language accordingly. This is one of those interesting side effects of tech on culture that is not immediately obvious, I think. It's basically an extension of "international English" which avoids things like phrasal verbs or coloquialisms, but more from the standpoint of, "If my coworker in Shenzhen puts this text into Google Translate and tries to create documentation from it, is it going to sound ridiculous?" And then doing a few translate/reverse-translate passes yourself until you've tweaked the text enough so the input and output is the same. Eventually, you start writing this way by default. This could be considered the same as telegram abbreviations, or even text-speak like "LOL" or whatever, but the key in this instance is we're changing our way of communicating based on what a computer can understand, not a fellow human.
- joshspankit 6y agoThis seems like a dangerous short-term tactic. What happens when the translation software gets better or just changes? Suddenly your text comes out wrong again.
- AussieWog93 6y agoYou've misunderstood the parent. He's not suggesting that you speak in order to attain some predicted Google Translate output, but instead it's helpful to use precise language that doesn't rely on a shared contextual understanding. For example, you'd use the phrase "upload it to the server" rather than "put it on the server" - the verb "upload" is unambiguous and lets both the recipient and the translation software know that "server" is referring to a computer system.
- joshspankit 6y agoAhhhh that makes much more sense, thank you for clarifying.
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- madrox 6y agoA similarly unintentional comedy in translation was a book I found several years ago that I believe was an autotranslation: "How to Good-bye Depression: If You Constrict Anus 100 Times Everyday. Malarkey? or Effective Way?". The amazon reviews are similarly hilarious. https://www.amazon.com/How-Good-bye-Depression-Constrict-Everyday/dp/0595094724 https://www.amazon.com/How-Good-bye-Depression-Constrict-Eve...
- ma2rten 6y agoThat's crazy, according to the reviews the first 90 pages are also just usenet conversations where people are making fun of the author who apparently just copy-pasted the conversations into the book.
- 0xbadcafebee 6y agoThis sounds like a work of genius. Unfortunately I have not resurrected my Abby's so I great I may next movie the thrush.
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- livueta 6y agoI have a copy of this! I found it in a used bookstore years ago and had to grab it. I'm pretty sure it's not auto-translated: like the sibling said, the first half-ish of the book is a verbatim collection of Usenet posts of the author, from 1999, writing in his characteristic broken English, earnestly laying out his anus-constricting theories while getting mildly trolled. The rest of it is a screed in the same style. Opening to a random page (really, didn't have to look for samples), we see > Besides shooting out a big blank from your buttock, you can feel as if your root chakra leaked sweet hot mucus. You can feel your root chakra as if it were an exciting womb. Cabala says "human being could have lived on the earth of high temperature long ago years as a human being of immaterial hermaphrodite". I think there has been the imprint of immaterial hermaphrodite in our physical body. Anyway, I'm pretty sure it's closer to Time Cube via English as a second language than bad/autotranslation per se - as far as I can tell it was originally written in English as there doesn't appear to be anything with a similar title in Japanese by anyone with that name, and there's a fair amount of common English-written-by-Japanese-speakers grammatical errors and other smells.
- joshspankit 6y agoI hope this is not too off-topic, but I really wish there were more (excellent) “literal translations”. Yes: it would be tricky and unpalatable for much of the audience, but I personally find it fascinating to get in to the “mind” of a language and would like the opportunity without having to memorize (something I find particularly challenging) the “words” of a language. Movie and TV subtitles especially.
- ani-ani 6y agoFor fr/en, author Jean-Loup Chiflet has written a few books consisting entirely of what you're describing. The most famous is "Sky My Husband (dictionary of the running English)"
- dheera 6y agoA lot of times literal translations eventually become a part of the destination language as well. Examples include "long time no see" which is now common in English but has roots in either Chinese or Native American languages. Likewise, the phrasing "chicken-egg problem" originated in Western culture but is now often used literally in modern Chinese, e.g. "雞和蛋的問題".
- amyjess 6y agoThe proper word for such translations, by the way, is "calque". Another famous calque is "groudhog", which comes from the Dutch aardvark. Yes, the two animals are completely unrelated: the Dutch referred to them both as aardvark though, and only one of them got calqued into English.
- exolymph 6y agoYES. I'm stoked about David Bentley Hart's New Testament translation for that reason: https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/030024844X/ref=ox_sc_saved_title_7?smid=ATVPDKIKX0DER&psc=1 https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/030024844X/ref=ox_sc_sav... > Reproducing the texts' often fragmentary formulations without augmentation or correction, he has produced a pitilessly literal translation, one that captures the texts' impenetrability and unfinished quality while awakening readers to an uncanniness that often lies hidden beneath doctrinal layers.
- achalshah 6y agoThe podcast Futility Closet had an entire episode on the book: https://www.futilitycloset.com/2015/05/18/podcast-episode-58-english-as-she-is-spoke/ https://www.futilitycloset.com/2015/05/18/podcast-episode-58...
- thordenmark 6y agoIt is well worth reading, or at least browsing through. ie. This phrase perfectly describes my sleeping habits: "Yesterday at evening, I was to bed so late that I may not rising me soon that morning." Get your own copy here: http://gutenberg.org/ebooks/30411 http://gutenberg.org/ebooks/30411
- exabrial 6y agoI've found literal translations to be very useful when learning phrases in foreign languages and subsequent listening as well.
- Syzygies 6y agoHuh. I always thought it was "rain like a cow pissing on a flat rock."
- meristem 6y agoI highly recommend the book “The cow went to the swamp”. It is illustrations of Portuguese sayings paired with literal English translations. If you speak Portuguese, it is precious. If you don’t, it is so bizarre you cannot help but laugh.
- adrian_b 6y agoThanks for the recommendation. I have found it and it is indeed hilarious.
- AirMax98 6y agoThe touchstone of all humor is a really dumb person who thinks that they are smart.
- saagarjha 6y agoFor those with an afternoon to burn, check of Star War The Third Gathers: Backstroke of the West, a fan dub of a poor roundtrip translation of The Revenge of the Sith: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XziLNeFm1ok https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XziLNeFm1ok. It’s filled with gems of this type.
- ggambetta 6y agoAn absolute classic. Here's a summary of the best parts: https://starwarsfans.fandom.com/wiki/Star_War_The_Third_Gathers:_The_Backstroke_of_the_West https://starwarsfans.fandom.com/wiki/Star_War_The_Third_Gath... Related: a long time ago, in a country far away where I grew up, I had a videotape of Star Wars with Spanish subtitles. It was awful. I think it was done by someone who didn't understand much English and knew nothing of Star Wars. I don't have that masterpiece anymore (nor a VCR player, for that matter), but off the top of my head: - They translated "Millenium Falcon" as "Numidian Flot". "She can outrun imperial starships" somehow became "it made two imperial starships run away". - Chewie was Yuri. - Near the beginning, Vader says something like "send a distress signal, and inform the senate that everyone on board was killed". The translation meant "send a distress signal, gather the senate, and kill everyone". - Near the end, Luke is doing the trench run, Vader shoots and misses, and says "the force is strong in this one". The translation meant "what a strange swinging motion".
- saagarjha 6y agoHaving taken Spanish in high school, I would love to watch that if you happen to find it :)
- hermitcrab 6y agoI have never understood why Chinese companies often have such hilariously bad English translations of their product instructions. Often the product quality is pretty good and the illustrations in the instructions are fine. But the English translation is terrible. There must be millions of Chinese people that speak decent English (in Hong Kong alone).
- tim333 6y agoI think they tend to be more expensive and thin in the ground in mainland China - Hong Kongers or native English speakers. That said Google translate does quite a decent job.
- Symbiote 6y agoYou need at least one person with at least basic English knowledge to know that the Chinese translation service is bad. (Google is blocked, remember.)
- berdario 6y agoThere are plenty of countries in which Google is not blocked, but knowledge of English is still relatively rare.
- hermitcrab 6y agoI forgot that Google was blocked in China.
- Al-Khwarizmi 6y agoThis is just something that I read somewhere so don't take it at face value, maybe someone who knows the issue better can confirm or deny it. But I remember reading that in Asian countries like China and Japan, they tend to base the selection of translators on knowledge of the source language, not the target. That is, they get the translator with the best knowledge of Chinese even if their English is broken.
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- aronpye 6y agoShaka, when the walls fell
- hi41 6y agoAs an Indian who is currently living in USA, how do I talk English like the white people? I try but fall short and my jokes are an embarrassment. I dream of one day talking like the white people. But my existence is lonely as no white person invite me home.
- zekrioca 6y agoStart first by studying western philosophy.
- ASalazarMX 6y agoHe said he was lonely already, do you want the white people to actually avoid him?
- lioeters 6y agoI've heard that watching a lot of American television shows can be effective. I think that can help you get familiar with commonly used slang, cultural values, typical patterns of behavior. Also, it would be essential to practice in real life, by interacting as much as possible with the "natives".
- hi41 6y agoThank you! When I was talking , someone said that I talk like I am reading a book. Is spoken English different from written English in books? All English I know is from reading text books in school and college.
- tekknolagi 6y agoIt can be. Dialogue tends to take shortcuts to make it shorter, to have run on sentences, and to use some colloquialisms not often found in books. I think watching people communicate in TV and movies is a reasonable recommendation, but you'll likely have to tone down the drama :) EDIT: Also podcasts or talk shows, potentially. I had this problem with German and I solved it by going to bars and chatting with people, but that's not super possible these days.
- Grustaf 6y ago“I know English well, I speak him every day” - A Russian friend
- tsoukase 6y agoLiteral translations of phrases from Greek to English language is a whole joke category in Greek. We even translate single compound words, eg πολυέλαιος (=chandelier) to 'much oil' (έλαιον=oil)