3 ms·

I want him to stop doing it and treat me like the other members of the team. So, I guess I want advice on how to make that happen, if it's even possible.

thinkingemote 6y ago
So you know what you want him to do, and you are asking for advice to get that to happen. So I imagine that you want to learn how to stop your team lead changing the code you contributed after you contributed? Or do you want to do something else? It helps to literally write out your own desires and wants of things that you can do yourself (versus other people doing) when it comes to these types of situations. For example in a similar situation I might say "I want to make a case to my manager that the team lead isn't treating me fairly" or I might say "I want to be less anxious at work" or I might say "I want to find reasons not to leave my job" or I might say "I just want to do my job with no problems or issues" or I might say "I want to learn how to approach my team lead with this problem" or possibly (and this is something I've done) "I want to feel better venting to others"
- klunger 6y ago
  Yep. If he has issues with it, fine. If he does though, I want him to bring this up during the code review process rather than passive-aggressively re-writing it after the fact.
  - reitanqild 6y ago
    > rather than passive-aggressively re-writing it after the fact. At this point I would start questioning you instead: - first: have you taken the time to read up on what passive aggressive means and how it usually plays out? IMO it is used way to often, just like micro-agressions etc. - then: why are you so sure that he is not trying to help you? - why would a tech lead do this silently if not to shield you? I've written most of this elsewhere and you haven't even commented on it. I say now is a good time to you to stop and think really carefully about the situation. His way to handle it might not be perfect, but you might be about to bite someone who's trying to help you. Don't do that.
jjgreen 6y ago
I'd expect that his thinking on reading the PR is that this code is OK, but could be improved by doing such-and-such, I'll do that later. i.e., he doesn't see it as rewriting but just as incremental improvement (and as such would be out-of-place as a PR comment). Ask him if he could put those ideas into PRs, as a learning opportunity for you.
reitanqild 6y ago
See my comment above, you know him better than me, but if I really wanted it to stop I'd ask politely one day, assuming good intentions (see my top level comment) why he does it. Something along the lines of: "I've noticed that you've rewritten my code a number of times and got <buddy> to approve it, and I really haven't been able to figure out why." If so, be prepared, some people can be a bit either on or off I guess.

thinkingemote 6y ago

So you know what you want him to do, and you are asking for advice to get that to happen. So I imagine that you want to learn how to stop your team lead changing the code you contributed after you contributed? Or do you want to do something else? It helps to literally write out your own desires and wants of things that you can do yourself (versus other people doing) when it comes to these types of situations. For example in a similar situation I might say "I want to make a case to my manager that the team lead isn't treating me fairly" or I might say "I want to be less anxious at work" or I might say "I want to find reasons not to leave my job" or I might say "I just want to do my job with no problems or issues" or I might say "I want to learn how to approach my team lead with this problem" or possibly (and this is something I've done) "I want to feel better venting to others"

klunger 6y ago
Yep. If he has issues with it, fine. If he does though, I want him to bring this up during the code review process rather than passive-aggressively re-writing it after the fact.
- reitanqild 6y ago
  > rather than passive-aggressively re-writing it after the fact. At this point I would start questioning you instead: - first: have you taken the time to read up on what passive aggressive means and how it usually plays out? IMO it is used way to often, just like micro-agressions etc. - then: why are you so sure that he is not trying to help you? - why would a tech lead do this silently if not to shield you? I've written most of this elsewhere and you haven't even commented on it. I say now is a good time to you to stop and think really carefully about the situation. His way to handle it might not be perfect, but you might be about to bite someone who's trying to help you. Don't do that.

jjgreen 6y ago

I'd expect that his thinking on reading the PR is that this code is OK, but could be improved by doing such-and-such, I'll do that later. i.e., he doesn't see it as rewriting but just as incremental improvement (and as such would be out-of-place as a PR comment). Ask him if he could put those ideas into PRs, as a learning opportunity for you.

reitanqild 6y ago

See my comment above, you know him better than me, but if I really wanted it to stop I'd ask politely one day, assuming good intentions (see my top level comment) why he does it. Something along the lines of: "I've noticed that you've rewritten my code a number of times and got <buddy> to approve it, and I really haven't been able to figure out why." If so, be prepared, some people can be a bit either on or off I guess.