3 ms·

> When a man has been rejected/ignored by EVERY SINGLE woman he has met thus far, you can't really blame him for not being very friendly towards the next woman

by crux_ 15y ago

> When a man has been rejected/ignored by EVERY SINGLE woman he has met thus far, you can't really blame him for not being very friendly towards the next woman he meets. a) "Not very friendly" is a different thing from assault and harassment. Don't use weasel words; you are writing a defence of the assaults and harassment in your comments, not "unfriendliness." b) Where do you think the rejections are coming from? I can't imagine that many women would want to date someone who resents their entire gender based upon some juvenile grudge. > The high school social scene is every bit as brutal to nerds as the tech social scene is to women. Thus the two evils are cancelled out, and everyone is absolved of all responsibility for their actions! Wait... that's not how it works? </sarcasm>

w1ntermute 15y ago
> "Not very friendly" is a different thing from assault and harassment. Don't use weasel words; you are writing a defence of the assaults and harassment in your comments, not "unfriendliness." I am not condoning sexual harrassment or any other illegal activity in any way. But I don't see a problem with giving what you get (i.e., not going out of your way to help out or be friendly to women in the industry). > I can't imagine that many women would want to date someone who resents their entire gender based upon some juvenile grudge. You're putting the cart before the horse. The grudge is a RESULT of women not wanting to date them, NOT the CAUSE. > Thus the two evils are cancelled out, and everyone is absolved of all responsibility for their actions! > Wait... that's not how it works? </sarcasm> You're still missing the point. People are not impartial and unemotional, even in a professional setting. Years of mental conditioning cannot be undone by just stating that certain rules of professional conduct must be followed.
- eropple 15y ago
  I don't see a problem with giving what you get (i.e., not going out of your way to help out or be friendly to women in the industry) Who's talking about "helping women out"? They don't need help. We're talking about not attacking them. You continue to use weasel words, except when directly confronted with your acceptance of harassment and assault, that imply that--hey--it's just not that big a deal. You are wrong. It is that big a deal. And acceptance of these behaviors--you can say you're not, but to be entirely honest I suspect disingenuity--is also wrong. You're putting the cart before the horse. The grudge is a RESULT of women not wanting to date them, NOT the CAUSE. And if they're emotionally unstable and immature enough to hold that sort of grudge, why exactly would anyone want to date them in the first place? It does, at the end of the day, go back to people who are reasonable and well-adjusted having little interest in close personal relationships with people who are unreasonable and ill-adjusted. Why should they behave otherwise? Why can't the ill-adjusted people with the seething rage toward anyone who doesn't have a Y chromosome grow up a little? People are not impartial and unemotional, even in a professional setting. Years of mental conditioning cannot be undone by just stating that certain rules of professional conduct must be followed. It's hard, so they shouldn't do it?
  - w1ntermute 15y ago
    > Who's talking about "helping women out"? They don't need help. We're talking about not attacking them. I'm not suggesting women in particular need help. Whether it's high school or the tech industry, a helping hand is always nice when you're getting started. But there's no reason to give one to someone who never gave you one when you needed it. > And if they're emotionally unstable and immature enough to hold that sort of grudge, why exactly would anyone want to date them in the first place? Emotional instability and immaturity are not personality traits inherent to all nerds. They are a RESULT of years of being ignored by women. Like I said before, the grudge is a RESULT of women not wanting to date them. At the beginning of high school, the nerds weren't emotionally unstable or immature. That is a RESULT of social isolation. > It does, at the end of the day, go back to people who are reasonable and well-adjusted having little interest in close personal relationships with people who are unreasonable and ill-adjusted. Why should they behave otherwise? Why can't the ill-adjusted people with the seething rage toward anyone who doesn't have a Y chromosome grow up a little? For the same reason that high school girls can't grow up a little and stop ignoring all the guys who aren't wearing jock straps and walking around with footballs. > Oh. It's hard, so they shouldn't do it. And it's hard to socialize with nerds in high school, so women just shouldn't do it, right?
    - eropple 15y ago
      Ah. I see now. It is women's fault for not understanding the special inner beauty and desirability of nerds, but not nerds' fault for choosing--as in, an active choice--to be avoidant shrooms at the computer. That makes complete sense. ... Wait...sorry, no, it makes no sense at all. And it's bullshit, to boot. Hell, I wasn't "wearing a jock strap and walking around with a football"--I'm overweight, tried out for the baseball team and totally bombed it, and was legendarily bad at sports in general--but I did all right. I could have been called a nerd in high school and college. I had serious computer interests (and in college I did Google Summer of Code twice), I was horrible at sports, all that. But I chose to socialize and act like a reasonably normal guy. Sports and all that are nice, I'm sure, but a decent--not great--personality, a willingness to take risks and sometimes be embarrassed, and a modicum of wit did, and do, me pretty well. It's not about playing sports. It's about leaving the basement and choosing to not adopt a victim complex just because some--not all, but some--people don't like you. These are things that our hypothetical nerds can choose to do, but don't. . Nerds make it impossible for people to want to socialize with them. I know this from experience, 'cause I did it too--I just realized what I was doing and stopped. Then they turn around and make other people--who, in this case, want to socialize with them, want to go to a conference where they are--miserable. That is, to be completely blunt, utterly fucked. And the blame lies solely on them for refusing to grow the hell up and act like a halfway decent human being.

by crux_ 15y ago

w1ntermute 15y ago

> "Not very friendly" is a different thing from assault and harassment. Don't use weasel words; you are writing a defence of the assaults and harassment in your comments, not "unfriendliness." I am not condoning sexual harrassment or any other illegal activity in any way. But I don't see a problem with giving what you get (i.e., not going out of your way to help out or be friendly to women in the industry). > I can't imagine that many women would want to date someone who resents their entire gender based upon some juvenile grudge. You're putting the cart before the horse. The grudge is a RESULT of women not wanting to date them, NOT the CAUSE. > Thus the two evils are cancelled out, and everyone is absolved of all responsibility for their actions! > Wait... that's not how it works? </sarcasm> You're still missing the point. People are not impartial and unemotional, even in a professional setting. Years of mental conditioning cannot be undone by just stating that certain rules of professional conduct must be followed.

eropple 15y ago
I don't see a problem with giving what you get (i.e., not going out of your way to help out or be friendly to women in the industry) Who's talking about "helping women out"? They don't need help. We're talking about not attacking them. You continue to use weasel words, except when directly confronted with your acceptance of harassment and assault, that imply that--hey--it's just not that big a deal. You are wrong. It is that big a deal. And acceptance of these behaviors--you can say you're not, but to be entirely honest I suspect disingenuity--is also wrong. You're putting the cart before the horse. The grudge is a RESULT of women not wanting to date them, NOT the CAUSE. And if they're emotionally unstable and immature enough to hold that sort of grudge, why exactly would anyone want to date them in the first place? It does, at the end of the day, go back to people who are reasonable and well-adjusted having little interest in close personal relationships with people who are unreasonable and ill-adjusted. Why should they behave otherwise? Why can't the ill-adjusted people with the seething rage toward anyone who doesn't have a Y chromosome grow up a little? People are not impartial and unemotional, even in a professional setting. Years of mental conditioning cannot be undone by just stating that certain rules of professional conduct must be followed. It's hard, so they shouldn't do it?
- w1ntermute 15y ago
  > Who's talking about "helping women out"? They don't need help. We're talking about not attacking them. I'm not suggesting women in particular need help. Whether it's high school or the tech industry, a helping hand is always nice when you're getting started. But there's no reason to give one to someone who never gave you one when you needed it. > And if they're emotionally unstable and immature enough to hold that sort of grudge, why exactly would anyone want to date them in the first place? Emotional instability and immaturity are not personality traits inherent to all nerds. They are a RESULT of years of being ignored by women. Like I said before, the grudge is a RESULT of women not wanting to date them. At the beginning of high school, the nerds weren't emotionally unstable or immature. That is a RESULT of social isolation. > It does, at the end of the day, go back to people who are reasonable and well-adjusted having little interest in close personal relationships with people who are unreasonable and ill-adjusted. Why should they behave otherwise? Why can't the ill-adjusted people with the seething rage toward anyone who doesn't have a Y chromosome grow up a little? For the same reason that high school girls can't grow up a little and stop ignoring all the guys who aren't wearing jock straps and walking around with footballs. > Oh. It's hard, so they shouldn't do it. And it's hard to socialize with nerds in high school, so women just shouldn't do it, right?
  - eropple 15y ago
    Ah. I see now. It is women's fault for not understanding the special inner beauty and desirability of nerds, but not nerds' fault for choosing--as in, an active choice--to be avoidant shrooms at the computer. That makes complete sense. ... Wait...sorry, no, it makes no sense at all. And it's bullshit, to boot. Hell, I wasn't "wearing a jock strap and walking around with a football"--I'm overweight, tried out for the baseball team and totally bombed it, and was legendarily bad at sports in general--but I did all right. I could have been called a nerd in high school and college. I had serious computer interests (and in college I did Google Summer of Code twice), I was horrible at sports, all that. But I chose to socialize and act like a reasonably normal guy. Sports and all that are nice, I'm sure, but a decent--not great--personality, a willingness to take risks and sometimes be embarrassed, and a modicum of wit did, and do, me pretty well. It's not about playing sports. It's about leaving the basement and choosing to not adopt a victim complex just because some--not all, but some--people don't like you. These are things that our hypothetical nerds can choose to do, but don't. . Nerds make it impossible for people to want to socialize with them. I know this from experience, 'cause I did it too--I just realized what I was doing and stopped. Then they turn around and make other people--who, in this case, want to socialize with them, want to go to a conference where they are--miserable. That is, to be completely blunt, utterly fucked. And the blame lies solely on them for refusing to grow the hell up and act like a halfway decent human being.