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Ask HN: What's Holding You Back?

• 14 6y ago
  I work in health care as a care aide and I have an invention I think could really help with a certain condition. I’ve started gathering some of the material I need to craft this but really don’t know what step 2 would be after that. Do I need a patent right away or what do I do after I make a product. I’m starting to get more serious on this as I have recently spent a few hundred getting what I need but still not feeling very motivated. I am Canadian. I have limited funds to invest. Any thought are welcome. Thank you.
  • jkcorrea 6y ago
    Incredible, that's the kind of passion project I was thinking of when I posted! So cool to be in that position to potentially help a lot of people.. Know little about patents but I imagine it's something you want to do earlyish in your industry. Do you have anyone to turn to to help make it a reality? Making it a team effort may help motivate you when you're feeling down.
• vuciv1 6y ago
  right now for me it's not being able to find users. I am building my first side project that I want to profit from and get myself down wondering how to get people to use what I'm making.
  • jkcorrea 6y ago
    This is a huge struggle for so many founders, you're definitely not alone in this so don't get down on yourself. Wish I had good advice beyond just saying that building it is only half the battle. Mind if I ask what you're building?
    • vuciv1 6y ago
      Of course. I unfortunately don't have anything to show yet, but I'm building a site for people to swap books they have for books they want!
• podge 6y ago
  Crippling depression.
  • jkcorrea 6y ago
    Sorry friend :(. Here to talk if you need it!
    • podge 6y ago
      Thank you, I appreciate it.
• anon2190 6y ago
  I am in my early forties, and have been starting companies since I was 16. I am well into my fifth serious company now (depending on how you count). But somehow, I keep repeating the same mistakes, and I am running out of ideas on how to fix it, to a degree that I have just stopped doing stuff two years ago. (Fortunately(?) I am well enough now to just give up...) For some reason, I always end up with an unhappy team. Even if the company is successful on paper in terms of numbers, there is always the feeling you hurt feelings no matter what you do, there's always someone who will feel attacked by someone else's internal communication. To a point where that even leaks to customers. This sounds easy to fix, but I am really conscious about it, and tried various strategies, with less involvement from my side, more involvement, having someone else do the hiring decisions, etc. - with my latest company, six years ago, I tried to stay out of it, hired CEOs, but now the company "works, barely" but there's nobody taking any initiative, nobody is passionate about it, everyone is just doing the minimal they can. I predict will not survive more than another few years. It makes me sad sometimes because the ideas behind the companies/products/services seem to be fine, the market is there, the money flows work, even without VCs. I'm just getting tired of all the social problems. This is not something my CS degree and all the coding and later management books and training prepared me for. (Throwaway account to protect the innocent.)
  • jkcorrea 6y ago
    Thanks for such an honest introspective to a life that I'm sure many of us here envy from the outside. This may be cliché, but I've heard a lot of successful founders talk about how they see the best and worst character traits in them manifest in the company culture, often 10x'd if left unchecked. Have you given any thought to how your own personality is affecting your babies (aka your companies)? Hiring/outsourcing the problem to someone else sounds like you're not confronting it head on - and teaching your employees that they can/should do the same. Probably reading too much into this though! Thanks for sharing.
    • anon2190 6y ago
      No, that's exactly it. At the beginning of course I thought it was bad hiring decisions, but after a while it became clear that this is "haunting me", and the only conclusion I can draw is that it has something to do with me. Which is when I started really to experiment with various strategies, none of which worked (probably because I can't run away from myself.) It is a bit sad, since I was quite successful in building networks, outside of my own companies: I am surrounded by a lot of entrepreneur-type people which I consider my friends, I have friendly investors lined up to support my product ideas. And I have at least 20 more "good ideas" that could be worth pursuing, but I am very reluctant to do so. So, two years ago, I extracted myself from everything. I've read what must now be at least two dozen "therapy books", started therapy with external professionals, but it doesn't feel like anything is bringing me closer to "the problem". I've always tried to establish an open culture, flat hierarchies, openly talking about things. But I became careful about it too, since I don't want to push stuff on others if they don't see the need. If it is always only me that wants to talk about such things, and rarely anyone else has anything to say, everybody is just waiting for me to "declare" how to do things, what the priorities should be... In all these years, I can remember only a couple of situations where anyone suggested to do something different from what I suggested. Yes, very likely I am "not a good leader". I recognize this. I don't want to be. I "just" want to have teams where you do stuff together, because it is fun, because it has a purpose, because it makes money, whatever. It works a lot better in situations where everyone has their own agenda and is not hired by "my company". What I always hoped for is to end up with a "real co-founder", but that never happened. I have lots of "co-founder friends", but of course we are all passionate about our own ideas... so lately I've been thinking, I should finally join some existing effort, instead of trying again and again to get my own efforts off the ground.
• the_only_law 6y ago
  A combination of time, motivation, money and luck tbh.
  • jkcorrea 6y ago
    If you had to pick one?
    • the_only_law 6y ago
      Depends on the problem, but for the most relevant to this thread, probably motivation.
• etothepii 6y ago
  For a long time I thought it was not having a good solution to an interesting problem. With hindsight though I know now it was having not found the right co-founder. Startupschool.org was a huge help and I'd recommend it to anyone.
• justrudd 6y ago
  Three things come to mind. The first is that at age 40 I finally started taking my health seriously. Long story short, I got bit by the “lift as much heavy weight as I can”. I’d love to one day lift respectable heavy weights. But at 44 with 2 shoulder surgeries in my rear view, I have to come to terms with I probably won’t ever hit a few of my goals. I still believe that I’m stronger than most 44 year olds around me though :) The second is work. I believe I’m average to above average developer. I’m good at keeping the big picture in my head. But because of depression (under control but still affects me) I am the worst procrastinator. I play schedule chicken with myself all the time. I’ve tried GTD, Pommadoro (sp?), and countless other “get shit done” techniques. Nothing works. I fear at some point I’ll play chicken and lose. At this point in my life, I’ve kind of come to terms with it. I can usually say “OK. Slack off today. But tomorrow you have to commit to at least 4 hours of work”. And that usually works. But the last couple of months - not so much. Hoping it’s not becoming permanent. The third is I was pretty isolated before COVID. I’m even more isolated now, and I like it. I’m afraid that I’m going full hermit (not in the strict sense of the word since I do work). And it scares me that I’m not MORE afraid of isolating myself even further from human beings.
  • jkcorrea 6y ago
    Congrats on the lifting wins, I could never put up much but the respect the self-discipline and routine required to make gains. If it's about a PR goal, consider how ridiculously arbitrary it is to set an attachment to being able to pick up and subsequently put down a heavy object. Progress never perfection, or something like that :) Agreed on the time management techniques, they all feel to me like programs developed by highly organized people who were going to be organized and on top of their schedule regardless..
  • eyelidlessness 6y ago
    Obviously I’m not qualified for diagnostics (I am not a doctor of any kind) but I can’t help but raise a hand when it feels familiar. The symptoms you describe are definitely characteristic of depression, but they’re familiar to me in adult diagnosed ADHD, which also presents as depression. (And as anxiety, which also triggers procrastination.) If lifting is motivating, it’s conceivable that what gets you going (or doesn’t in its absence) is dopamine. I’ve felt similarly with isolation too, both the comfort and the fear of going too deep. When I feel like isolating, I feel like I’m fully in control of what I find fulfilling or rewarding. But then I miss that from my people eventually. Not trying to say that my thing is yours. But offering my experience in case it might resonate.
• sircastor 6y ago
  I sometimes get stuck on “what’s the point of this?” More specifically what the end really will actually bring about. Over the last several months I’ve been working on a small display fountain I wanted to put outside my house joining to entertain folks as they walk by. Every so often though I get stuck on “is anybody at all going to care about this?” And then I waste an afternoon watching videos or something. For me, I have to find the will to push through those moments and get it done.
  • jkcorrea 6y ago
    I can relate. The fountain sounds cool if not purely because you like it, is that not enough of a reason?
    • sircastor 6y ago
      It should be enough reason, I just need to convince my self-doubt of it. The trouble in particular is getting momentum on any part of the project can be a tough hill to climb.
  • bigbluedots 6y ago
    I hear you, I have found myself getting stuck on "what's the point/end goal of this, and is it worthwhile?" for some time now. Among other things, I am a sometime musician and writing music is difficult enough in itself, without thinking "there is so much music out there that it's unlikely that more than a few people will hear my music, so why bother?" Plenty of folks seem to just enjoy the journey and not think too hard about the destination, I'd love to be one of them.
    • jkcorrea 6y ago
      Oh fascinating, you and GP must be "destination not the journey" whereas I feel very much the opposite like you say. Never realized there's a distinction. Is it like that you need external validation, or to know you'll please other people with a piece of music you right? What if it's just to make yourself happy? I'm terrible with music though, I can't imagine writing something new is easy at all even before you get in your head about the outcomes.
• trinovantes 6y ago
  Loss aversion bias I'd love to one day leave my tiny hometown in Canada and get exposed to foreign cultures (primarily interested in US/Japan/Germany). However, I find it hard to stomach tossing out the ~$10k worth of crap that I've accumulated over the years so that I can move abroad -- even though I've heard from my friends that top companies have ludicrous signing bonuses that can allow me to replace everything. Maybe once Covid is finally under control in a year or two, I'll be able to overcome my personal bias. For now, I'll focus on studying foreign languages in my spare time and avoid impulse buying.
  • jkcorrea 6y ago
    A friend once told me, right after I had settled in to my first cozy big tech job: "you should be uncomfortable being too comfortable". May be the single most useful advice I've ever received. Also, having lived in Tokyo for a year, just freakin do it. So much new things to learn there. oh, and ironically that friend has stayed at their cozy corporate gig and doesn't seem to heed their own sage advice very much :/
• kstenerud 6y ago
  In one word: money. Enough money to have a yearly income such that I don't need to have a job anymore, and can devote my time to building https://concise-encoding.org https://concise-encoding.org and all of the technologies that will be built upon this foundation (protocols, streaming and communication technologies, data transports, etc). Over the past 3 years, I've had two periods of a couple of work-free months where my output went sky-high, and I miss that. Don't get me wrong: I love my job, the people, the industry, etc. In fact I was hired there because they built a major pillar of the company on one of my open source projects. But at the same time, 8h a day uses up a significant chunk of my creative juices that would otherwise turbo-charge my open source initiatives. I see all of these people who have enough money that it generates a comfortable income for them with minimal effort on their part, and it tears me up to see them wasting all that luxurious time on frivolous pursuits rather than contributing to humanity. I won't complete most of my works because there's not enough time in a human lifespan (and I'm at peace with that - it just means I have to prioritize), but there's so much more I could accomplish without these other claims on my time...
• pansa2 6y ago
  Primarily a lack of time, but also a lack of focus. I’ve never found one single project that fulfils everything I’m looking for, so am currently dividing what time I have between two: - A website about video games that I love to work on - but which has a niche audience and is ultimately quite frivolous. - A programming language implementation which could provide significant value to its future users - but building it is frustrating and not always interesting. There is some crossover of skills and knowledge between the two projects, but at the moment they’re both progressing very slowly. I’m also losing time to analysis paralysis - should I stop working on one of them? Which one? (Might I find a purpose in games, or a passion for languages?) Or should I carry on trying to progress both?
  • jkcorrea 6y ago
    Have a similar situation myself.. strategy-wise a niche audience sounds more attractive than a potentially-big-but-vague market. But looking at my own setup, I'm much more attracted to working on my grand-vision low-code app builder tool that has an undefined market than I am to a niche b2c business that's actually making (minimal) profit. Conventional wisdom in startup land is to focus on one thing, but I find myself disagreeing with that notion and kinda want it all ;)
• runawaybottle 6y ago
  I want to build something for the App Store, but I feel like if it’s not perfect, it will be a wasted launch. It feels like you can’t really iterate in an App Store product, it needs to be bullet proof on the first go. Plus it needs to be native in iOS/android to pull off the ui patterns. It just feels like a shit ton of work, but I sincerely believe it’s the obvious solution. I’m perturbed by the mountain of work and execution necessary here, so of course, I indulge in the fantasy of it being built vs putting in daily progression towards making it a reality. All this leads to disliking who I am.
  • jkcorrea 6y ago
    Asking with some self-interest for a project I'm working on: Is there anything in particular about the project that's frustrating/time-consuming? Or just the whole thing altogether? Projecting a bit here, but your dilemma seems to resonate really well with this essay, especially when you mentioned "indulging in the fantasy": https://www.trevormckendrick.com/essays/future-you-masturbation https://www.trevormckendrick.com/essays/future-you-masturbat... Pains me to hear it makes you dislike yourself, means next to nothing from a stranger online, but you're obviously smart, passionate, and care about your (potential) users' experiences, which is pretty admirable by itself. We see so many stories here of epic devs/biz persons moving mountains and executing their visions, but I'd be surprised if the large majority of them didn't go through a rut like what you currently are facing at least once.
    • runawaybottle 6y ago
      The arduous thing is that I haven’t ever done native app development, so will need to learn it. I cannot use the cross-platform frameworks to bootstrap since the product primarily aims to solve the current UX/UI provided by existing apps. The article pretty much nails what I’ve been doing (and I’m embarrassed to even admit the nature of my success fantasies, they are laughably delusional, but my goto guilty pleasure to indulge in). But, the disliking myself part comes from the fact that I don’t operate like this when it comes my day job. I always tackle a problem with discipline, reduce scope, find some way to a solution with consideration for correctness/time-investment. So why am I acting like a jerk-off when it comes to this other thing? I think a little has to do with the fact that I’m envisioning another concept in the most saturated app space imaginable, one that most people (including myself) would say ‘don’t even bother doing another one of those unless you take it up a notch’. The day-job pragmatist in me is talking the fantasist in me out of this nonsense basically (fantasist doesn’t know Swift for example, needs that reality check). It’s almost like being a parent and not having faith in your kids, you will feel bad about this on some level.
• wildleaf 6y ago
  Mine are more in the pathetic realm. I feel fatigued all the time. I sleep a lot and will wake up exactly 1 minute before standard working hours begin. It doesn't seem like there's any time. The second I finish work there's a black hole of making dinner, cleaning, doing a few chores, and then falling into bed.
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  • jkcorrea 6y ago
    Those are far from pathetic, in fact some of the most real and valid reasons. Mental health is so important. But holy crap did I feel exactly this when working at bigtech. 1-2hr commute plus long days and short weekends it can all blur together so quickly. Winter especially was the worst when it was dark out long before I left the office. On the sleeping note - have you been tested for sleep apnea before? I'm young, slim and healthy but felt exactly that way (sleep 12+ hrs on nicest bed I could find, humidifier and air purifier and all, but still not feel rested & needing to go to my car during work to take a nap..). Low and behold I tested positive for sleep apnea, and I've heard CPAPs can be night and day for many with it.
    • wildleaf 6y ago
      No, I haven't been tested, but I know that I snore if my weight goes above a threshold. Covid has kept me from exercising so my sleep is probably taking a huge hit.
  • eyelidlessness 6y ago
    I haven’t looked at your responses but I hope you’ve gotten plenty that will amplify what I’m going to say: there’s nothing pathetic about this. Waking up, doing the same thing as the previous day, surviving, going to sleep, repeat... is uninspiring, and can feel soul crushing. I even bought a shirt about it to have a memory of this time, a Nine Inch Nails shirt that just repeats the lyric “every day is exactly the same” over and over. Anyway, what you’re feeling is normal. It’s not a good feeling, but you’re not feeling it alone.
• deleted 6y ago
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• javierluraschi 6y ago
  I've been a Software Engineer wanting to do a startup since I got my first job, 2021 is finally the year I'm trying this out full time, see https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=25610809 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=25610809 So, knock on wood, nothing is holding me back right now; however, money did hold me back for many years. The recent stock rally helped me close this gap and can now give this a shot with some safety. I really hope, one day, we can live in a world where following our passion is not decided by luck nor privilege. I'm hoping I can succeed and help others achieve their dreams.
• eecks 6y ago
  Someone else said 'I sometimes get stuck on “what’s the point of this?”' and it resonates with me a lot. I am probably the closest I have been to launching an MVP for a site I am building and it really hits me hard. "Will anyone use this?", "why even finish it?", "how will it support itself financially" etc.