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While I like most aspects of Stoicism, I do have a vengeful streak that I don't want to completely abandon. I agree that communities are the way to think about
by megameter 6y ago
While I like most aspects of Stoicism, I do have a vengeful streak that I don't want to completely abandon. I agree that communities are the way to think about it.
I think I've managed to get more mature and strategic about revenge than "tit-for-tat", because I've noticed that this is usually calculated for by abusers, so I look instead for a combination of getting myself to safety(thus avoiding the self-inflicted trauma) while creating a subtle barrier or danger zone for the other party, a place where they spend more energy than I do to get less results.
- o-__-o 6y ago> while creating a subtle barrier or danger zone for the other party, a place where they spend more energy than I do to get less results I’m interested in some examples of these strategies? I’ve found this works eg in the workplace but not so much with family
- o-__-o 6y agoI just found an example: addressing conflicts in a group setting vs 1-1. When confronting 1-1 they can manipulate you with anger, however with a neutral third-party they must spend more energy to manipulate multiple parties and anger instantly minimizes their position.