4 ms·
My mother has dementia, and I know 5 other close friends that are starting to deal with it as well. This is becoming an epidemic and what people don’t realize i
by remote_phone 6y ago
My mother has dementia, and I know 5 other close friends that are starting to deal with it as well. This is becoming an epidemic and what people don’t realize is that it is extremely expensive and exceedingly cruel. Most health care systems, including Canada and the US, do not handle dementia well at all. You have the choice of becoming financially destitute keeping your parents in a dignified setting, or you can let them essentially rot in a public facility which is basically a hospital. It’s terrible and needs a better solution.
- adamredwoods 6y agoMy mother was purposely financially destitute when she died post dementia. It was the only way for the state to help pay for services without collecting everything (house, car, pension, etc). Later we were able to put her on hospice and that offered much more assistance. I cannot describe the stress in trying to figure out financials as a loved one is dying. It led to many sleepless nights...
- exhilaration 6y agoWe're just going through this with my dad, far fewer resources for the middle class when it come to getting assistance at home. Becoming "purposely financially destitute" sounds like a good strategy but I'm sure it has its own risks.
- klondike_klive 6y agoAt least in the UK attempts to gift money to relatives or sell a house to prevent it being sold to pay for social care is seen as "deprivation of assets" in a financial assessment.
- ska 6y agoI think in a lot of jurisdictions this is possible, but there are timing considerations. I know families who have moved significant majority of assets to children much earlier than any medical issues, partially as a hedge against this.
- noitsnot 6y agoThere are laws in the U.S. which prevents someone from qualifying for full medicare benefits of, let's say for example, nursing home care. There is a 5 year look-back period to verify you haven't liquidated assets or you will be penalized.
- Darkphibre 6y agoLost both my parents over the years. For my mom I sunk all available income paying for in-home care. For my dad I... couldn't, so we had to go the purposeful route. Condolences on the financial stresses, it truly is a burden that arrives at the worst of times.
- klondike_klive 6y agoIt's a real kick in the balls isn't it. We've been spared having to sell my parents' house for now because my mom died last week of Alzheimers. Now facing the prospect of having to think about it all over again for my father. I need to start living better.