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> if you’re capable of being alone social connection isn’t always load-bearing for your happiness and fulfillment. I don't disagree with you, but I do think it
by munificent 6y ago
> if you’re capable of being alone social connection isn’t always load-bearing for your happiness and fulfillment.
I don't disagree with you, but I do think it's worth considering that maybe we are happiest when social connection is load-bearing.
A life where no one needs you and you need no one is a life with no stakes at all. When I think back on the experiences in my life that were the most meaningful, that made me feel my life was deeply worth living, it's almost always times where I did something important for someone or someone did something important for me. At the very least, it's times where a meaningful experience was shared with people I care about.
There is a trend in the world (and all over this thread) that the ultimate goal of life is invulnerabtily. To subtract everything that could possibly hurt you. I get that. I do that too. But I have learned in the past couple of years how high a cost that carries.
If you never expose your soft spots to anyone, you never experience the absolutely profound joy and connection of having someone who sees you, warts and all, and earns your trusts and loves you completely.