4 ms·
Not sure how much interest there is on this topic on HN, I may be talking to myself. For me, it's a matter of being misunderstood by everyone. Literally. I don
by 11thEarlOfMar 6y ago
Not sure how much interest there is on this topic on HN, I may be talking to myself.
For me, it's a matter of being misunderstood by everyone. Literally. I don't mean they can't parse what I say, I speak English perfectly clearly. It's that they ascribe thoughts, emotions and motives to my words and actions that are wrong. They then react to those misunderstandings and I find myself in a constant state of defense and trying to correct misperceptions, usually in futility. After the frustration and anger it definitely leads to an enduring, moderate sadness.
Middle aged white men are not all cut from the same cloth, any more than any other group is. For others to tell me what I think and feel based on my gender, race and age is as bigoted as anything else. Sad.
- elzorroplateado 6y agoThis interests me. I know exactly what the author refers too. As a white good loooking and fit man, I have no grounds for feeling bad and no technology — no app, SAAS, PAAS, device — exists to stave it off. I’ll be okay.
- evocatus 6y agoIt's exhausting. Constantly walking on eggshells for fear of being misconstrued. Ruminating over past communications exploring the myriad ways in which your words could have been interpreted. Feeling like you are cognizant of everyone else's (hypothesized) misunderstandings but unable to address them forthrightly because misperceptions can't be so bluntly corrected through direct action. Eventually, yes - the frustration subsides into a cold, resigned, sense of fatalism. Spoken as a minority who really can't find any labels they identify with.