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First off, congrats on getting something out there. You asked for advice on improving your landing page. Your landing page has a clear objective (nice!), to ge
by jyu 15y ago
First off, congrats on getting something out there.
You asked for advice on improving your landing page. Your landing page has a clear objective (nice!), to get visitors to create an account. The problem is you don't give them concise and compelling reasons to do so.
The headline should contain your best benefit. Your current headline, "Lifemall is a marketplace and community of people like you" does not state who should be using it, or why they should bother. Most people would read your headline, not see any benefit, and press the back button then and there.
The rest of your copy also could use a lot of improvement. It provokes more unanswered questions in a visitor's head:
Are they new vs used?
What kind of stuff is on the site now?
Are these knock offs?
What's different from this site than craigslist/ebay/amazon/costco?
Why do I need to create an account before I see anything?
What do they need my email for?
This is a huge block of text, where are the images?
How can I trust this site?
- throwaway938371 15y agoAll valid points. The purpose of Lifemall is to allow people to share things they own that they want to sell to, or indeed buy from other people. These people can be friends, but also people with similar tastes or complete strangers. The products can be new or used. The reason you want to create an account first is that we want to build a marketplace more around people than the products. This we believe, should lead to more trust. Potentially, this could differentiate us from other marketplaces where more emphasis is placed on commercial or profit-centric things. I guess this expanded version of your critique could be simplified into something more accute. What that could be, I'm not sure. (Hence the marketplace and community of people like you version)