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I think this is a good point to keep in mind. Some things sound good but can hurt people's perception of you if used too much, or incorrectly. Apologize too q
by rootusrootus 6y ago
I think this is a good point to keep in mind. Some things sound good but can hurt people's perception of you if used too much, or incorrectly. Apologize too quickly, and without really making sure it was actually a mistake worth apologizing for, and people start to get used to the idea of you being constantly wrong.
I've run into something that is kinda-sorta-similar with regards to praising other people. I really took it to heart a long time ago that I should focus on building other people up and giving credit, always keeping positive, etc. That's not terrible advice, but I've found that if you give everyone else credit too often it shifts people's perception of you. So be nice, give credit where it's due, but don't turn away praise, and accept with good grace credit that is given to you. You want people to remember that you are skilled.
- DoreenMichele 6y agoSelf-deprecating humor was another thing that went bad places I didn't expect it to go. When I was in high school, I got in the habit of cracking self deprecating jokes because I was one of the top students. It was a means to try to put other people at ease and signal "I'm just plain folks and not perfect and please don't be intimidated. Please relax." Later in life it only served to convince people I was a loser and/or had terrible self-esteem issues (or both). And there is no remedy for it once that happens because how are you supposed to explain the joke? "Noooooo. You have that backwards. I'm so sure I'm better than you that I'm trying to bring myself down to your level and seem approachable!" 0_o Yeah, no. Just no.
- salamimonger 6y agoWhen someone who is top of the class self-deprecates themselves, often people will interpret that as an attack on them, as it looks like you're bringing yourself down to their level, which implies you actually do see yourself on top and them lower than you. I hate being pitied. You're far better off just being who you are, and damn proud of it.
- deleted 6y ago[deleted]