It's hard to describe. I have a competitive energy that drives stereotypically masculine behavior. When it was unfocused and untrained, it led to aggression and

It's hard to describe. I have a competitive energy that drives stereotypically masculine behavior. When it was unfocused and untrained, it led to aggression and hypersexuality. When it's focused, it leads to goal- and status-oriented behavior. When I say anti-masculine, I mean that it seems like society nowadays just seems to try to suppress this energy in boys. Rambunctiousness is shamed and considered ADHD. Competitiveness is looked down upon, replaced instead with cooperation. There was a time when I tried to suppress this side of myself, but it just made me feel bad. Much of my transition to adulthood involved learning how to manage this masculine energy.