> If you don't look at bad dates as a learning opportunity, and instead allow yourself to blame factors outside of your control for causing your bad dates, you

> If you don't look at bad dates as a learning opportunity, and instead allow yourself to blame factors outside of your control for causing your bad dates, you tread dangerously close to incel mentality. I definitely don’t disagree with the above, but I honestly don’t think the exact opposite is very good either. In other words only blaming yourself can get you in a heap of self-doubt, discouragement, distraction and all around lack of faith and hope in ever having a dating life or serious relationship. I mean at this point you don’t think the opposite gender is the problem you think you yourself are. I honestly fall into this trap way too often. Can also say I’ve fallen in the above quoted sections trap from time to time too. But I’m not saying forget doing self introspection. That is important but also don’t beat yourself up. I’m saying you and speaking in general here these comments are not directed towards the parent commenter in any way.