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Interruption isn't inherently bad. Lots of conversations go like: Person A: "If the system's going to be configured with option X-" Person B: "We just heard w
by jimmaswell 6y ago
Interruption isn't inherently bad. Lots of conversations go like:
Person A: "If the system's going to be configured with option X-"
Person B: "We just heard we're definitely going with option Y"
Person A: "Oh thanks, so.."
Nobody is served by person A going on that tangent with a false assumption, so a quick interruption is fine.
Of course needless or rude interruptions are bad. Maybe part of this should be that women should be made to feel more comfortable giving necessary interruptions like in my example.
- overkalix 6y agoThis happened to me very recently. It was a meeting with five people and I asked for some information. But when she started answering I realized I had phrased my question poorly, and as a result she wasn't really addressing my actual concerns. When I tried to interrupt to clarify my question, she slightly raised her voice to drown me out. So when she concluded her explanation I had to go "sorry, what I actually meant to ask was ...".
- Zenbit_UX 6y agoThat's where a well placed "Hold on" plus an accompanying hand gesture can come in handy. It's a brief enough interruption to get through and be heard, while also being understood as "what you're saying is not what was asked/intended, allow me to clarify".
- jbc1 6y agoSounds like you're a church of interruption person. Whereas this advice is about teaching women to go from meek to church of strong civility. https://sambleckley.com/writing/church-of-interruption.html https://sambleckley.com/writing/church-of-interruption.html
- jimmaswell 6y agoI wouldn't subscribe to the more constant interruption the people in the story use, but overall I guess so.
- spyckie2 6y agoAs a soft spoken male I get interrupted all the time, usually not for efficiency. There's rarely been an interruption where I personally thought it was justified. The interruptions for clarification and false assumption are not the interruptions OP is talking about. In the example given, person B does not try to actively take control of the conversation, just quickly inserts a correction and allows person A to continue. So there's no need for persona A to say "let me finish my thought". It's not that women should be made to feel more comfortable giving these soft types of interruptions... it isn't that hard to correct someone's factual mistakes. It's that interruptions are used by dominant people as a political tool to assert hierarchies and for control. Women do it too, it's not a gender issue but I can imagine it more difficult in gender imbalanced teams and with gender stereotypes in play. In my opinion if a person has to say "can you let me finish my thought" the interruption is never justified. Even if someone is rambling or mistaken, there are better ways to deal with that - for instance, asking them to be more concise in their presentation of their point. Being proud of a culture of interruption is admitting politics is how you make your decisions and how your team works together.