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Be aware that your comment unfortunately contributes to the current division. It's subtle, and you may not be aware of it, but the tone you use, the words "rott

by jml7c5 6y ago

Be aware that your comment unfortunately contributes to the current division. It's subtle, and you may not be aware of it, but the tone you use, the words "rotten" and "madness", the emphasis on "end other people" - they have the pathos and call to action of an "us vs them" atmosphere. What is destroying society is anger, emotion, and tribalism. Our best hope of saving it is deliberation, consideration, and the dreary slog of rational understanding debate. Strong views expressed dispassionately and all that.

nvahalik 6y ago
The problem isn't strong views. It's weak people. There is a time and a place to coddle people. There is _also_ a time and a place for people's whose ideas are garbage to be declared as such and thrown into the bin. There was a time when people could discuss ideas without having those ideas be internalized within an individual. It is entire possible to attack an idea or way of thinking to break it down and see how it works without involving a single person. If you want to have constructive dialog about these kinds of things, people being "offended" will only shut down conversation instead of fostering it. Thicken up your skin, decouple yourself from these ideas, and talk about them like adults.
- pvg 6y ago
  There is a time and a place to coddle people Individual people and groups of people get to decide for themselves what these times and places are, even if you think their decisions are wrong. It seems odd to demand this be done to your liking in the interests of 'adulthood'.
- hn_throwaway_99 6y ago
  I, respectfully, very much disagree. A lot has been said about people not being able to handle criticism, about being "weak", or snowflakes, etc. I believe that is a misdiagnosis. Because when many people shriek the loudest about wanting to "cancel" others, or taking an unintended slight as a symbol of "vicious oppression", these people are usually speaking from a position of power, not a position of weakness. Being able to whip a Twitter frenzy of many thousands of people into a scarlet-letter stamping mob doesn't sound very "weak" to me. At the end of the day, what this really is is a power struggle, and understanding why many feel the need to engage so passionately in this power struggle will get you closer to the heart of the issue IMO.
  - nvahalik 6y ago
    We're looking at weakness differently. As someone who was bullied growing up, when I discovered that I could ignore those people, it was a powerful moment in my life. I suddenly had total control over them because they couldn't control me. My ability to ignore them and to not respond to them in kind was a new kind of power. They couldn't get what they wanted, so they eventually found new people to mess with. When we lash out at people, when we "whip up a Twitter frenzy", that is not resilience or strength. That is being blown around by whatever wind happens to be hitting you at the time. When your self-worth or mental state can be disrupted by someone who said something that offends you, then you will perpetually be the victim and the only way you "win" is when others do exactly like you want them to do whenever you are around. That's not strength—that's manipulation.

by jml7c5 6y ago

nvahalik 6y ago

The problem isn't strong views. It's weak people. There is a time and a place to coddle people. There is _also_ a time and a place for people's whose ideas are garbage to be declared as such and thrown into the bin. There was a time when people could discuss ideas without having those ideas be internalized within an individual. It is entire possible to attack an idea or way of thinking to break it down and see how it works without involving a single person. If you want to have constructive dialog about these kinds of things, people being "offended" will only shut down conversation instead of fostering it. Thicken up your skin, decouple yourself from these ideas, and talk about them like adults.

pvg 6y ago
There is a time and a place to coddle people Individual people and groups of people get to decide for themselves what these times and places are, even if you think their decisions are wrong. It seems odd to demand this be done to your liking in the interests of 'adulthood'.
hn_throwaway_99 6y ago
I, respectfully, very much disagree. A lot has been said about people not being able to handle criticism, about being "weak", or snowflakes, etc. I believe that is a misdiagnosis. Because when many people shriek the loudest about wanting to "cancel" others, or taking an unintended slight as a symbol of "vicious oppression", these people are usually speaking from a position of power, not a position of weakness. Being able to whip a Twitter frenzy of many thousands of people into a scarlet-letter stamping mob doesn't sound very "weak" to me. At the end of the day, what this really is is a power struggle, and understanding why many feel the need to engage so passionately in this power struggle will get you closer to the heart of the issue IMO.
- nvahalik 6y ago
  We're looking at weakness differently. As someone who was bullied growing up, when I discovered that I could ignore those people, it was a powerful moment in my life. I suddenly had total control over them because they couldn't control me. My ability to ignore them and to not respond to them in kind was a new kind of power. They couldn't get what they wanted, so they eventually found new people to mess with. When we lash out at people, when we "whip up a Twitter frenzy", that is not resilience or strength. That is being blown around by whatever wind happens to be hitting you at the time. When your self-worth or mental state can be disrupted by someone who said something that offends you, then you will perpetually be the victim and the only way you "win" is when others do exactly like you want them to do whenever you are around. That's not strength—that's manipulation.