I've worked in Houston (and have driven on the I-45 during rush hour) so I know what you mean. I've also been to NYC many times so I know the other extreme too

I've worked in Houston (and have driven on the I-45 during rush hour) so I know what you mean. I've also been to NYC many times so I know the other extreme too. I think a good urban environment accommodates mixed-mode transportation, with a preference for mass transit but also reasonable accommodation for motor vehicles. I live in Chicago where mass transit is a big thing (an anomaly in the midwest) especially downtown and the north side, but the driving experience here isn't that bad either. The congestion -- even pre-covid -- is never really too bad (at least not by LA or Houston standards), and parking is expensive but not astronomical. I guess in Chicago there are options. If I want to get somewhere quick by car (and am willing to pay for it), I can. Or if I want to pay way less and use public transit, I can too. Toronto is similar.