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God bless anyone with a family member who is mentally ill. That said, the situation described in the article is completely toxic and almost assuredly fraudulent
by trentnix 6y ago
God bless anyone with a family member who is mentally ill. That said, the situation described in the article is completely toxic and almost assuredly fraudulent. Which would be par for a sociopath.
And despite what the author implies, a hallmark of a sociopath is a lack of any genuine awareness that they are a sociopath. So it is safe to assume the “admission” is just another manipulation.
- jessaustin 6y agoCan God bless the mentally ill too? Asking for a friend...
- 0_gravitas 6y agoI would personally prefer a trained psychiatrist to do it instead
- jessaustin 6y agoPsychiatrists who have been trained (are there some who haven't?) would be the people to call for psychiatry, but for blessings we'd prefer to go to the source.
- 082349872349872 6y agoHaving been reading WP for Sir Humphrey Appleby GCB KBE MVO yesterday, I learned about the patron saint (for those who believe comparative advantage applies even to the divine) of mental disorders: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dymphna https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dymphna
- brundolf 6y agoI thought it was both fascinating and really sweet the way they've done the hard work to develop such a functional relationship. Every relationship has rough spots; most are bigger than this crush thing. To me it was a very wholesome story.
- trentnix 6y agoI believe you are mistaken to assume (or believe the author's word) that theirs is a functional relationship. Sociopaths are incapable of functional relationships. Every relationship is based on manipulation and exploitation. That's why when I read the article, all I see is attempted manipulation and exploitation of the reader.
- brundolf 6y agoI pity your cynicism.
- trentnix 6y agoMe too, really. However... “Experience that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn. - CS Lewis
- chrisdinn 6y agoThe tragedy is, as you and I know, it’s naivety like that in the parent comment sociopaths happily take advantage of. Reading it felt like watching someone give their money to a Nigerian prince.
- brundolf 6y agoIt isn't naivety. I believe that by declaring a whole category of person as intrinsically broken beyond repair (in this case, "incapable of functional relationships"), the inevitable outliers of such a bold claim will become a self-fulfilling prophecy. If sociopathy is a spectrum, and someone is on that spectrum who would still be able to find a happy and functional life, and they are told without qualification that they are incapable of loving or being loved, they are going to ostracize themselves and live out that story. Even worse is the case where someone thinks they might be a sociopath, or has been misdiagnosed as one, because as we all know psychology is far from an exact science. Nobody deserves to be marked unlovable based on the way they are born. Period. If someone has already hurt you personally then that's different: an individual is different from a category, actions are different from hypotheticals, and trust is different from compassion. I'm not saying a person's past actions should be ignored. What I am saying is that everyone should be considered based on their own individual choices. “We are all receiving Charity. There is something in each of us that cannot be naturally loved.” ― C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves
- jl2718 6y agoCompared to the experience of anybody that has been their codependent, this article makes sociopaths appear as downright whimsical. If she really is a sociopath, it’s a carefully-crafted tip of the iceberg sort of cathartic lie. And if she’s not, well, it’s still a lie, but the self-deprecating kind that endears us to her; which is exactly what a sociopath would want us to believe, just for fun, no other reason. You can’t figure it out. You can’t win. It will destroy you and everything you know about yourself. Move on.
- vmception 6y ago> a hallmark of a sociopath is a lack of any genuine awareness that they are a sociopath I just don't really believe this is always true. What do you call the people consciously doing sociopathic things? This is a ridiculous paradox.
- trentnix 6y agoSelfish. You call them self-centered and selfish.
- arexxbifs 6y agoIt depends on what you mean by "genuine awareness". Anyone with a diagnosed personality disorder will of course know that they have a personality disorder. An alcoholic might engage in behavior that matches sociopathy (lying, manipulation, irritability, etc) for various reasons (covering for their drinking, getting access to alcohol and so on). What makes it different is that the alcoholic deep down can recognize that their drinking is a problem and hence also act to mitigate their destructive behavior. A sociopath might be theoretically knowledgeable about their condition, but they can do little, if anything, to mitigate how they act and even if they know that everyone else might think something they do is wrong, they simply don't care. In other words: an alcoholic is likely to wish for not being an alcoholic, while a sociopath is likely to want to stay a sociopath. An example of this is Sam Vaknin[0], who also monetizes his personality disorder after a fashion. There's a documentary about him and his wife floating around on Youtube, "I, Psychopath". [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sam_Vaknin https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sam_Vaknin
- tartoran 6y agoSam Vankin claims he is a malignant narcissist not a psycopath. He is even adamant about it. He seems very knowledgeble about the subject and found myself listening to quite a few of his rants. I also saw the documentary you mentioned and am on the fence.
- arexxbifs 6y agoYes, I know he does. In the documentary he is assessed by some very knowledgeable experts and he qualifies as a psychopath. There's also comorbidity between NPD and APD and some traits also overlap.