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> I personally feel that "Being who you are", "Staying true to yourself" etc, are very negative things to tell someone I think life advice is much more case-by

> I personally feel that "Being who you are", "Staying true to yourself" etc, are very negative things to tell someone I think life advice is much more case-by-case than we tend to acknowledge. Maybe Person A needs to stop being so hard on themselves, stop conforming to other people's expectations for once, and just live life the way they want to live it. But maybe Person B needs to take a good hard look at their life choices, and understand that they've been hurting themselves and the people who love them. Maybe Person C needs to take a risk every once in a while, learn to think outside the box. But maybe Person D needs to get their affairs in order and start following through on long-term plans. Maybe Person E is too nice, and Person F isn't nice enough. Some people need to hear "be who you are." Other people need to hear the opposite.

kiliancs 6y ago
Reducing life advice to a few words is a disservice to the quality of the advice.
RangerScience 6y ago
Most super-simplified advice like "be who you are" is actually just people repeating the instructions that led them to their growth experiences, but it's not the actual growth experience.
- TeMPOraL 6y ago
  Same is true for proverbs and folk wisdom. I used to hate those as a young person. They always sounded trite, cliché. Now I recognize them for what they are - pointers to experiences. Pointers in the programming sense. You just won't get a piece of folk wisdom until you've lived through a situation to which it applies, and then thought about it and perhaps did some introspection. But after that, that proverb becomes a concise and convenient way to communicate to others who also get it, "hey, the situation will likely evolve this way", or "consider applying this pattern of reasoning to the situation". The best proverbs are phrased in such a way to at least point you in the right direction if you don't understand them. But in the end, you can't skip experiencing the subject of the proverb yourself.
  - Fnoord 6y ago
    This describes exactly my viewpoint of religion. I grew up with a Christian background but at young age (I remember questioning it at the age of 5-6) decided I wouldn't devote my life to it. Nowadays, I recognize many of the lessons shared/taught through these stories, and I wonder if my children are going to be better off with or without them. At the very least, they'll still get similar lessons from Disney.
    - paulryanrogers 6y ago
      Growing up in charismatic Christianity I don't think the baggage is worth whatever modest bits of advice are there. It seems to me like looking trying to strain potable water from a thoroughly polluted lake.
- roenxi 6y ago
  Nobody is going back and verifying their growth experiences were actually a good idea though. I enjoy pointing out that there is no globally dominant religion - who whatever the most correct spiritual outlook is we know most people have it wrong. Given how few people achieve meaningful success or happiness under their own steam it seems fundamentally risky listening to their advice. Most people are playing status games - there are a lot of losers and no winners in status games these days. The world is too big.

kiliancs 6y ago

Reducing life advice to a few words is a disservice to the quality of the advice.

RangerScience 6y ago

Most super-simplified advice like "be who you are" is actually just people repeating the instructions that led them to their growth experiences, but it's not the actual growth experience.

TeMPOraL 6y ago
Same is true for proverbs and folk wisdom. I used to hate those as a young person. They always sounded trite, cliché. Now I recognize them for what they are - pointers to experiences. Pointers in the programming sense. You just won't get a piece of folk wisdom until you've lived through a situation to which it applies, and then thought about it and perhaps did some introspection. But after that, that proverb becomes a concise and convenient way to communicate to others who also get it, "hey, the situation will likely evolve this way", or "consider applying this pattern of reasoning to the situation". The best proverbs are phrased in such a way to at least point you in the right direction if you don't understand them. But in the end, you can't skip experiencing the subject of the proverb yourself.
- Fnoord 6y ago
  This describes exactly my viewpoint of religion. I grew up with a Christian background but at young age (I remember questioning it at the age of 5-6) decided I wouldn't devote my life to it. Nowadays, I recognize many of the lessons shared/taught through these stories, and I wonder if my children are going to be better off with or without them. At the very least, they'll still get similar lessons from Disney.
  - paulryanrogers 6y ago
    Growing up in charismatic Christianity I don't think the baggage is worth whatever modest bits of advice are there. It seems to me like looking trying to strain potable water from a thoroughly polluted lake.
roenxi 6y ago
Nobody is going back and verifying their growth experiences were actually a good idea though. I enjoy pointing out that there is no globally dominant religion - who whatever the most correct spiritual outlook is we know most people have it wrong. Given how few people achieve meaningful success or happiness under their own steam it seems fundamentally risky listening to their advice. Most people are playing status games - there are a lot of losers and no winners in status games these days. The world is too big.