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"I wonder if online hostility and polarization would be reduced if people simply had calm in-person discussions with each other once a week" That might work fo

"I wonder if online hostility and polarization would be reduced if people simply had calm in-person discussions with each other once a week" That might work for some people? I don't know? But I do know that the Charleston church shooter sat down with a bunch of little old ladies for the duration of a bible study engaging in, what I can only assume was, a calm in-person discussion. Then he blew their heads off. Point is that, for some reason, the internet has a much stronger hold over people than do in person connections. People deeply believe they are more connected to people in their virtual spaces than they are to their neighbors or even physical friends. That sense of connection is real to those people. To some of those people, it's real enough to kill for.

wool_gather 6y ago
That's not really a good counterexample. Do you think that Roof attended the bible study with the intent of actually discussing -- let alone listening to -- anything? It was almost without question just part of the setup for his attack.
leetcrew 6y ago
I think you are arguing from outliers here. contrary to how it may seem on the news, mass shootings are quite rare events, even in the US. the fact that you and I have registered accounts and made at least one post on HN makes us outliers even in this community. are there some people for whom virtual spaces are more real than their neighbors and IRL friends? sure, but most people don't seem to be like that. as far as I can tell, most people use social media to interact with an extended network of IRL friends/family. some people do try to get tons of followers that they don't know on instagram, but I think even this is best understood as jockeying for status among IRL peers. note: IRL is a somewhat antiquated term this days, but I use it as a shorthand for "relationships that originate in in-person interactions". so if I had a friend A who moved away and befriended B there, but we all play video games together, B is still an IRL friend to me.

wool_gather 6y ago

That's not really a good counterexample. Do you think that Roof attended the bible study with the intent of actually discussing -- let alone listening to -- anything? It was almost without question just part of the setup for his attack.

leetcrew 6y ago

I think you are arguing from outliers here. contrary to how it may seem on the news, mass shootings are quite rare events, even in the US. the fact that you and I have registered accounts and made at least one post on HN makes us outliers even in this community. are there some people for whom virtual spaces are more real than their neighbors and IRL friends? sure, but most people don't seem to be like that. as far as I can tell, most people use social media to interact with an extended network of IRL friends/family. some people do try to get tons of followers that they don't know on instagram, but I think even this is best understood as jockeying for status among IRL peers. note: IRL is a somewhat antiquated term this days, but I use it as a shorthand for "relationships that originate in in-person interactions". so if I had a friend A who moved away and befriended B there, but we all play video games together, B is still an IRL friend to me.