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That resonates with my own experience. I walked away from a bad relationship and my mental stamina, as you call it, improved dramatically. Memory is better, I a

That resonates with my own experience. I walked away from a bad relationship and my mental stamina, as you call it, improved dramatically. Memory is better, I am much more active and confident. I still have a very demanding job, so maybe I should change that as well.

inglor_cz 6y ago
So much yes! One should feel happy coming home, not dreading the moment. Fortunately, my lovely wife is such a person.
chrisweekly 6y ago
See also "The Happiness Equation" which boils down to "Be happy first." NOT: Hard work -> success -> happiness RATHER: Happiness -> best work -> success
- briefcomment 6y ago
  Intuitively, I don’t doubt that, but certainly there are unhappy “successful” people right? My tentative explanation for this is that many people luck themselves into “success” and then fight tooth and nail to keep it.
  - wholinator2 6y ago
    Oh certainly! That is simply a paradigm and no paradigm can fit the whole (unless there's a better paradigm). Anyways, it depends on your definition of success. If it includes happiness then by definition no. If it's more vague then that then probably. I would define perfect success as something like improving the world and being happy about it. To that point there are definitely construction workers and nurses who hate their jobs and actively despise but still make the world a better place, are they successful? I believe your internal mental state will reflect and impact upon those around you and the things you are significant for. Does being an unhappy boss who gets great results make you not successful. The core issue lies in definitions. We could dream up a definition of success that could define any number of contradictory traits. That is for you to decide and society at large to gently guide.
  - qznc 6y ago
    A different angle I sometimes see is Unhappy -> Ambition -> Success. However, these types of people might not be happy in the end. For example, I remember Elon Musk saying "you wouldn't want my life."
  - mrlala 6y ago
    For sure, infact "successful" people are probably in general less happy because they do not prioritize happiness. Sure they might be able to more easily achieve some artificially (vacations, new stuff). But that isn't the same as truly learning how to be happy.
- orzig 6y ago
  Definitely worth keeping in mind, although it is important to remember but these are not a linear series of checkboxes. You’re going to have fluctuating quality of work, happiness, success every single week, month and year. It is also very possible that the causality runs in both directions. The universe is complex, and ice really don’t have it all figured out, but acknowledging that complexity will prevent a lot of theory induced blindness!

inglor_cz 6y ago

So much yes! One should feel happy coming home, not dreading the moment. Fortunately, my lovely wife is such a person.

chrisweekly 6y ago

See also "The Happiness Equation" which boils down to "Be happy first." NOT: Hard work -> success -> happiness RATHER: Happiness -> best work -> success

briefcomment 6y ago
Intuitively, I don’t doubt that, but certainly there are unhappy “successful” people right? My tentative explanation for this is that many people luck themselves into “success” and then fight tooth and nail to keep it.
- wholinator2 6y ago
  Oh certainly! That is simply a paradigm and no paradigm can fit the whole (unless there's a better paradigm). Anyways, it depends on your definition of success. If it includes happiness then by definition no. If it's more vague then that then probably. I would define perfect success as something like improving the world and being happy about it. To that point there are definitely construction workers and nurses who hate their jobs and actively despise but still make the world a better place, are they successful? I believe your internal mental state will reflect and impact upon those around you and the things you are significant for. Does being an unhappy boss who gets great results make you not successful. The core issue lies in definitions. We could dream up a definition of success that could define any number of contradictory traits. That is for you to decide and society at large to gently guide.
- qznc 6y ago
  A different angle I sometimes see is Unhappy -> Ambition -> Success. However, these types of people might not be happy in the end. For example, I remember Elon Musk saying "you wouldn't want my life."
- mrlala 6y ago
  For sure, infact "successful" people are probably in general less happy because they do not prioritize happiness. Sure they might be able to more easily achieve some artificially (vacations, new stuff). But that isn't the same as truly learning how to be happy.
orzig 6y ago
Definitely worth keeping in mind, although it is important to remember but these are not a linear series of checkboxes. You’re going to have fluctuating quality of work, happiness, success every single week, month and year. It is also very possible that the causality runs in both directions. The universe is complex, and ice really don’t have it all figured out, but acknowledging that complexity will prevent a lot of theory induced blindness!