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This is what you responded to, this is what is being advocated. > "Hi! First let me say how much I appreciate this library, it really helps with X. When I, or

This is what you responded to, this is what is being advocated. > "Hi! First let me say how much I appreciate this library, it really helps with X. When I, or anyone else in this thread advocates for adding a life story into a bug report or the like, then you can bring in your stories about stories and it'll be relevant. > Is the message you want to convey simply that I should not volunteer my time to helping people? Quite obviously not, it's that you should stop comparing yourself to those in life threatening, intensely time pressured situations and try to be more pleasant to those you're responding to, not trying to find excuses around doing so. You work in a pleasant environment, with low pressure, and are well rewarded, you definitely have the time to be well mannered. > maintainers who prefer ass kissing are egotistical and dominating It's not about "ass kissing" but basic respect, and if you wanted to provide an example of how not to exercise restraint and apply any semblance of etiquette, that would be a good one. Do you ever wonder why development is a "sausage fest" instead of the emergency room?

reificator 6y ago
Speaking of basic respect, when someone admits to a mistake several times in a conversation and says explicitly "I waded in" and "it wasn't fair [of me]", repeatedly focusing on berating them for that mistake is not very respectful. It shows that you are not listening to understand, but to find argumentative points. If you're truly concerned about dominating behavior that drives people away, I suggest you start with your own communication. I've been there myself, and I slip up quite often, so don't take this as judgement, only advice.
- brigandish 6y ago
  > Speaking of basic respect, when someone admits to a mistake several times in a conversation and says explicitly "I waded in" and "it wasn't fair [of me]", repeatedly focusing on berating them for that mistake is not very respectful. We go from a grandmother's chilli recipe in an issue and end up with a comparison using bleeding patients in an ER. That's not someone apologising for a mistake and correcting, that's someone trying to wriggle around easily challenged and fantastical statements used as excuses. What next - are we airline pilots trying to save a plane with 3 failed engines while children selfishly ask for a tour of the cockpit?

reificator 6y ago

Speaking of basic respect, when someone admits to a mistake several times in a conversation and says explicitly "I waded in" and "it wasn't fair [of me]", repeatedly focusing on berating them for that mistake is not very respectful. It shows that you are not listening to understand, but to find argumentative points. If you're truly concerned about dominating behavior that drives people away, I suggest you start with your own communication. I've been there myself, and I slip up quite often, so don't take this as judgement, only advice.

brigandish 6y ago
> Speaking of basic respect, when someone admits to a mistake several times in a conversation and says explicitly "I waded in" and "it wasn't fair [of me]", repeatedly focusing on berating them for that mistake is not very respectful. We go from a grandmother's chilli recipe in an issue and end up with a comparison using bleeding patients in an ER. That's not someone apologising for a mistake and correcting, that's someone trying to wriggle around easily challenged and fantastical statements used as excuses. What next - are we airline pilots trying to save a plane with 3 failed engines while children selfishly ask for a tour of the cockpit?