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> It’s not that you stumble, it’s that you get back up. It’s not that you did something wrong but that you realize what’s happening and change. It’s not that yo

> It’s not that you stumble, it’s that you get back up. It’s not that you did something wrong but that you realize what’s happening and change. It’s not that you messed up as a friend or lover, it’s that you see ways you can be better. Having the wrong priorities is bad enough, but realizing that and refusing to change is worse. We have a new hire at my work. He's been on board 10 to 12 weeks now. His skill set is the least of our bunch. Fair enough, we all have to start somewhere. The problem is, he refuses to change. He's some form of Bartleby the Scrivener. Speaks 5x more than he listens. He has been asked to not do certain things certain ways, he's acknowledged those requests, and then has gone and done otherwise. He's been hand-held by people with experience very much his senior and yet he seems completely unwilling - we believe he's able - to "update his software." We've missed client deadlines because of him and he's yet to own a single misstep. The point is, it's not only himself who is compromised by his "learning disabilities." He's not young. Fifties-ish I guess. I also haven't seen his CV so I'm not sure how he sold himself. That said, if he's typical of people in that age range I now understand why many employers are reluctant to hire the "over-experienced." It's not that they fear paying more, it's that they're not going to get current and contemporary value. Note: Before you accuse me of age stereotyping I'm actually older than he is. I'm also skill for skill one of the least robust members on our team. But I listen. I openly ask for feedback. I'm still wanting to learn and grow. Perhaps I'm some sort of freak?

throwaway77384 6y ago
"Perhaps I'm some sort of freak? " You're clearly not. It's sort of astounding to think that someone could get to that age and not have learned the lessons in life that teaches one to listen and own up to mistakes. Some sort of nepotism perhaps? It's not age-ist to point out that you would have expected someone of that age to be more self-aware. People that cannot own their own mistakes are downright dangerous. The older, the worse. It's sort of odd, because some people can just 'slip through', all the way to the top (failing upwards, I believe it is called), because if you perfect the art of not admitting mistakes, some people mistake that for confidence / skill (and often, the more money you have, the easier it becomes to do this).
- chiefalchemist 6y ago
  > because if you perfect the art of not admitting mistakes, some people mistake that for confidence / skill He definitely has a pattern. Something I presume he's perfected over the years? Intentionally? Unintentionlly? Probably both. He drinks so much of his own Kool Aid that his disconnect is close to delusional. It's disheartening. The only redemption for me is being wired to solve problems. I'm not so sure I'll crack this one. Human behavior is difficult enough. This is a tough one.
sokoloff 6y ago
Whether they’re 21 or 51, if they can’t or won’t do the job after some reasonable period of trying, part ways with them and hire someone else. Just like you need to individually work on improving, the company employee garden needs tending to as well. That’s not just water and fertilizer; sometimes that involves removing plants. FWIW, I doubt the problems you describe are age or age-group related.
- chiefalchemist 6y ago
  Oh no doubt such things transcend age. That said, there's truth to fact that most people tend to develop ways and get set in them the older they get. The point being, experience is a double edge sword. An employer might not be age discriminating per se, as much as they need - and rightfully so - ppl who are able and willing to learn new tricks. Often that profile is not old dogs.
deleted 6y ago
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throwaway77384 6y ago

"Perhaps I'm some sort of freak? " You're clearly not. It's sort of astounding to think that someone could get to that age and not have learned the lessons in life that teaches one to listen and own up to mistakes. Some sort of nepotism perhaps? It's not age-ist to point out that you would have expected someone of that age to be more self-aware. People that cannot own their own mistakes are downright dangerous. The older, the worse. It's sort of odd, because some people can just 'slip through', all the way to the top (failing upwards, I believe it is called), because if you perfect the art of not admitting mistakes, some people mistake that for confidence / skill (and often, the more money you have, the easier it becomes to do this).

chiefalchemist 6y ago
> because if you perfect the art of not admitting mistakes, some people mistake that for confidence / skill He definitely has a pattern. Something I presume he's perfected over the years? Intentionally? Unintentionlly? Probably both. He drinks so much of his own Kool Aid that his disconnect is close to delusional. It's disheartening. The only redemption for me is being wired to solve problems. I'm not so sure I'll crack this one. Human behavior is difficult enough. This is a tough one.

sokoloff 6y ago

Whether they’re 21 or 51, if they can’t or won’t do the job after some reasonable period of trying, part ways with them and hire someone else. Just like you need to individually work on improving, the company employee garden needs tending to as well. That’s not just water and fertilizer; sometimes that involves removing plants. FWIW, I doubt the problems you describe are age or age-group related.

chiefalchemist 6y ago
Oh no doubt such things transcend age. That said, there's truth to fact that most people tend to develop ways and get set in them the older they get. The point being, experience is a double edge sword. An employer might not be age discriminating per se, as much as they need - and rightfully so - ppl who are able and willing to learn new tricks. Often that profile is not old dogs.

deleted 6y ago

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