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You shouldn't really have to 'try' in a conversation. If it feels that way, it's fine to just be quiet until you feel like talking (if ever). Learning to be com
by danenania 16y ago
You shouldn't really have to 'try' in a conversation. If it feels that way, it's fine to just be quiet until you feel like talking (if ever). Learning to be comfortable with silence around others is one of the keys to beating social anxiety. That horrible awkwardness you feel when you can't think of the 'right' thing to say is the core of it all.
Friendly quiet people are as well liked as anyone. If the other person feels awkward, so what? Let the encounter end. No need for you to feel awkward too. If you can learn to meet people without getting stressed out because you don't click with most of them for whatever reason, it becomes much easier and more natural to meet people, and you'll have a better chance of finding your kind of people amidst all the madness. Have low expectations and occasionally you will be pleasantly surprised.
The best way to meet others is to do things with people. Look for any possible way to do things you like with others, whether it's a hobby, sport, game, working, studying, painting, whatever. This removes the need for much conversation and the ones you have will be easier and more genuine because there's something to talk about that gets the ball rolling.
Also, it couldn't hurt to take mdma with a group of nice people if you get the chance.
- anxiousThrowawy 16y agoI like the do idea. I've always been passive and waited for others to make decisions and organize the activity. I'm embarrassed that I made this post now as I'm sure this is obvious to most people.
- danenania 16y agoIt may sound obvious, but it's pretty deep in easier said than done territory.