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Personally I’d rather maintain my self respect and integrity. Sucking up to a manager is exactly the kind of toxic bureaucracy that destroys companies and ulti

Personally I’d rather maintain my self respect and integrity. Sucking up to a manager is exactly the kind of toxic bureaucracy that destroys companies and ultimately societies. Do good work. Do the best work you can. If you want to be Machiavelli, go into politics.

RussianCow 6y ago
No one said anything about "sucking up" to your manager at all. In fact, my interpretation of the parent was more akin to making sure that you can have open, two-way communication with your manager, so that they understand the importance of the work you are doing. A bad manager (or one that simply doesn't see eye-to-eye with you) can ruin an otherwise fulfilling job, no matter what you do.
PakG1 6y ago
I see this attitude too often among technical people. They think that having a good relationship with someone means sucking up and losing one's integrity, when in fact, it just means having a good relationship. Having a good relationship with my wife doesn't mean I'm sucking up to my wife. We love and respect each other because we value each other. I don't love my manager, and my people don't love me, but we better respect each other and know how to have good relationships with each other. Technical people who have difficulty having good relationships with others in the workplace need to understand that they can be difficult people to work with, and that they often create drama due to their misconceptions about what relationships are. People who have good relationship skills can also tell the difference between having a good relationship with mutual respect, as opposed to actually sucking up to some narcissist. All technical people need to be able to have that level of relationship wisdom, the ability to see the difference. Sadly, and this is the most unfortunate part, people who are bad at it often think that they're good at it, and so they don't understand why they're being attacked when they're not actually being attacked; then they get angry and disgruntled, creating what was a preventable situation.
dasil003 6y ago
You wholly misunderstood me. I can see you like the blunt approach so let me be clear: if your manager does not value what you are doing then quit your job.
- rixed 6y ago
  What's the rationale? "If your manager does not value what you are doing then quit your manager" would make more sense, but of course would be of little practical value. For the record, you are not employed by nor for your manager. Have a look at your employment contract, it is probably not written that your job is to please or help promote your manager. Usually, your job is to perform some kind of action directed towards the outside of the company (like shipping software to customers). That's really my issue with big companies: by the sheer effect of inflated volume, one gets surrounded more and more by coworkers, internal projects, etc, and come to forget that the purpose of it all is to act on the outside world not within the corporation itself. That's at least how I understood the parent's "think only about doing your job" and I agree wholeheartedly.
  - cutemonster 6y ago
    > then quit your manager" would make more sense (I think that's nitpicking on words. That s/job/manager/ carriers the same message)
  - dasil003 6y ago
    I was responding to one pedant, I can't satisfy another pedant with the same choice of words. Yes, you may have the option of changing managers. You may have other options. Get creative.

RussianCow 6y ago

No one said anything about "sucking up" to your manager at all. In fact, my interpretation of the parent was more akin to making sure that you can have open, two-way communication with your manager, so that they understand the importance of the work you are doing. A bad manager (or one that simply doesn't see eye-to-eye with you) can ruin an otherwise fulfilling job, no matter what you do.

PakG1 6y ago

I see this attitude too often among technical people. They think that having a good relationship with someone means sucking up and losing one's integrity, when in fact, it just means having a good relationship. Having a good relationship with my wife doesn't mean I'm sucking up to my wife. We love and respect each other because we value each other. I don't love my manager, and my people don't love me, but we better respect each other and know how to have good relationships with each other. Technical people who have difficulty having good relationships with others in the workplace need to understand that they can be difficult people to work with, and that they often create drama due to their misconceptions about what relationships are. People who have good relationship skills can also tell the difference between having a good relationship with mutual respect, as opposed to actually sucking up to some narcissist. All technical people need to be able to have that level of relationship wisdom, the ability to see the difference. Sadly, and this is the most unfortunate part, people who are bad at it often think that they're good at it, and so they don't understand why they're being attacked when they're not actually being attacked; then they get angry and disgruntled, creating what was a preventable situation.

dasil003 6y ago

You wholly misunderstood me. I can see you like the blunt approach so let me be clear: if your manager does not value what you are doing then quit your job.

rixed 6y ago
What's the rationale? "If your manager does not value what you are doing then quit your manager" would make more sense, but of course would be of little practical value. For the record, you are not employed by nor for your manager. Have a look at your employment contract, it is probably not written that your job is to please or help promote your manager. Usually, your job is to perform some kind of action directed towards the outside of the company (like shipping software to customers). That's really my issue with big companies: by the sheer effect of inflated volume, one gets surrounded more and more by coworkers, internal projects, etc, and come to forget that the purpose of it all is to act on the outside world not within the corporation itself. That's at least how I understood the parent's "think only about doing your job" and I agree wholeheartedly.
- cutemonster 6y ago
  > then quit your manager" would make more sense (I think that's nitpicking on words. That s/job/manager/ carriers the same message)
- dasil003 6y ago
  I was responding to one pedant, I can't satisfy another pedant with the same choice of words. Yes, you may have the option of changing managers. You may have other options. Get creative.