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Thanks for your post. I took a look at your other comment too and it was very insightful. I think we're going to look into Big Brothers/Sisters as well when COV

by daenz 6y ago

Thanks for your post. I took a look at your other comment too and it was very insightful. I think we're going to look into Big Brothers/Sisters as well when COVID starts to clear up...maybe it will inspire us one way or another, or maybe it will fulfill the parenting need completely. >Lastly, you absolutely will LOSE your previous life. There isn't a part of it you can retain. It's gone....period. This is probably the biggest challenge against the idea of having children. We both like our lives and hobbies...a lot (we make work together as well). It's part of our identity, so the thought of giving it up is very difficult to entertain. It feels selfish, but it's who we are.

RemingtonLak 6y ago
I wouldn't consider yourself selfish by not having a child. Bringing in a child into this world is simply contributing to society, but then you can do that in many other selfless ways. But I feel there will be a personal sacrifice by not having a child. I consider myself a loner beside loving my wife, I have no reason to leave a legacy. However, there is something to be said to share your life, experiences and knowledge with someone who can benefit. Passing that to someone is rewarding for sure i.e. Big Brothers, bt there is something more, something special if it is your own flesh and blood. Something very innate. Lastly, typically you and your spouse will most likely die separately. Even with families close by, there is nothing like knowing your own flesh and blood will be there. The inherent trust and bond is undeniable. >>Lastly, you absolutely will LOSE your previous life. There isn't a part of it you can retain. It's gone....period. Little overly stated since my son needs me 24/7 now. However, overtime, he'll need this space and my wife and I may be able to get back to where we were. Of course one factor to consider is age so this is where having your child at an earlier age has it's advantages. So truly get back to where we were will most likely be based on your age.

by daenz 6y ago

RemingtonLak 6y ago

I wouldn't consider yourself selfish by not having a child. Bringing in a child into this world is simply contributing to society, but then you can do that in many other selfless ways. But I feel there will be a personal sacrifice by not having a child. I consider myself a loner beside loving my wife, I have no reason to leave a legacy. However, there is something to be said to share your life, experiences and knowledge with someone who can benefit. Passing that to someone is rewarding for sure i.e. Big Brothers, bt there is something more, something special if it is your own flesh and blood. Something very innate. Lastly, typically you and your spouse will most likely die separately. Even with families close by, there is nothing like knowing your own flesh and blood will be there. The inherent trust and bond is undeniable. >>Lastly, you absolutely will LOSE your previous life. There isn't a part of it you can retain. It's gone....period. Little overly stated since my son needs me 24/7 now. However, overtime, he'll need this space and my wife and I may be able to get back to where we were. Of course one factor to consider is age so this is where having your child at an earlier age has it's advantages. So truly get back to where we were will most likely be based on your age.