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A great piece of advice I heard is "don't treat your partner worse than a stranger". Most people wouldn't dream of being abusive to a stranger they just met, ye
by logicchains 6y ago
A great piece of advice I heard is "don't treat your partner worse than a stranger". Most people wouldn't dream of being abusive to a stranger they just met, yet they're fine with being abusive to the person they're supposed to care most about.
- kstenerud 6y agoI understand the sentiment, but the way you avoid potential conflicts with strangers is to impose distance, which is not what you want in close relationships. You'll offend your partner far more often than you would a stranger because you are intimate and vulnerable to each other, which makes it far more likely that you'll hurt each other unintentionally, but also far more likely that you'll have a full and meaningful relationship, provided you practice good relationship hygiene. A good resource is Dr. Gottman: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LLXX8wzvT7c https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LLXX8wzvT7c